Today we discover Colonel Custard with Pokémon in Russia as we address our phobias and pot de crème encounters. Through groaning spreads and crustards of flessssh, we finally realize the dark, universal dominance of custard. Please, no gifts and no speeches.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I'm Matthew.
Molly:
I'm Molly,
Matthew Amster-Burton:
This is Spilled Milk the show where we cook something delicious, eat it all and you can't have any.
Molly:
Today we are talking about custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I think I'm excited about this. We've done episodes before where I didn't know much about the topic, but this is one where, you said custard and I'm like, oh custard. Everyone knows custard. Then I realized the massive gaping abyss at the center of my knowledge.
Molly:
Well, here's the thing, Matthew, we're going to define custard in a second, but I think custard-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
We're having the define the custard conversation.
Molly:
Yeah, we are. Also have you noticed that custard in general is just a gross word?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah.
Molly:
When I was on Wikipedia, looking up custard, there were pictures with captions, like a bowl of custard and stuff like that. I was like, God, this sounds like a really terrible euphemism or ...
Matthew Amster-Burton:
It does like baby batter. Is that what you're thinking?
Molly:
Like baby batter. Boy ...
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Let's just introduce that at the top of the shows so that you won't be able to think about anything else for the next 47 minutes.
Molly:
Anyway, I also keep finding myself, wanting to talk about Colonel Mustard from the game Clue. Well, I keep wishing his name were Colonel Custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I see.
Molly:
Right.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah.
Molly:
Anyway. But what-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
We're due for a Clue reboot, I think. In England, we're talking about, [Cluedo 00:01:31].
Molly:
What I'm trying to say here is that I think you're going to find that custard is everywhere as soon as we start talking about it.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. I'm excited. I want to learn about the world of custard all around me. It's like fungi.
Molly:
It is. Or like bacteria, like the custard will outlive us all.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes.
Molly:
I mean, I think it's not living, but I'm still working on this bit.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Okay.
Molly:
Anyway, what I also want to specify right off the top is that we're talking about sweet custards here, not savory custard. No quiche, what else is there? Just savory custards.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Chawanmushi.
Molly:
Yes. None of that. That's the Japanese savory custard. Anyway, we're talking sweet custards here.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
But Chawanmushi is the only custard I know.
Molly:
Well, here we go. Let's go down memory lane.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Great. I do remember having custard, I think I want to say like a cold vanilla custard as a kid. I didn't like it. It was too eggy for me, maybe.
Molly:
I know we've talked in previous episodes about how I was very anti lumps in my yogurt as a child.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes.
Molly:
Finding a lump in my Dannon vanilla yogurt could just ruin everything for me. I was a fun child.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I understand.
Molly:
Extremely fun child. Anyway, that carried over into custard for me. I found custard to be a really challenging texture as a child, even though-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
But how often did this come up?
Molly:
Well pudding comes up a lot when you're a kid.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Wait a minute, but is pudding custard?
Molly:
Pudding is a custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Glad we're getting into this because I wanted to talk about that. Because I tried to figure out, I Googled what is the ... I started typing, what is the difference and Google just completed between pudding and custard. I didn't understand, there were so many contradictory answers.
Molly:
We're going to get there, but basically, when you're a kid, do you remember all those jello pudding ads?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes, absolutely.
Molly:
I think when you and I were kids that was when there were first single serving pudding cups introduced.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes, absolutely.
Molly:
I do feel like pudding was a prominent dessert and snack in my childhood era and I was not into it. My dad was always a big fan of custards, he loved making rice pudding. Whenever we were in a restaurant that offered creme brulee, he would want to get creme brulee. I found it pretty terrifying.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Because of the torch?
Molly:
No, because of the texture of the custard. Custard to me-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Crème brulee is good. You were wrong to doubt it.
Molly:
I was big time wrong. I mean-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Although actually, usually it's not good because usually something's wrong with it, but when it's good, it's very good.
Molly:
Well, here's the thing. I think that for me, the texture of custards and puddings was a bit too close to the texture of jello, which I did not like as a child. Too jiggly, too gelatinous, and now I'm into all of those things.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. No, we know that you're all about jiggly things now.
Molly:
Jigglypuff.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Jigglypuff who evolves into ...
Molly:
I don't know. We've reached the edge of-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Jiggly master.
Molly:
We've reached to the edge of my Pokemon knowledge.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
All right. You see, I started typing who does, and Google immediately completed Jigglypuff evolve into, and the answer is Wigglytuff.
Molly:
Oh, God that's great.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
That is just so cute.
Molly:
Is that like when you overset your custard, it goes from being Jigglypuff to Wigglytuff?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I think that's exactly right. Wigglytuff is the jello jigglers of Pokemon.
Molly:
Yeah. But wait, I want to point out an exception to my custard and pudding phobia. That is, do you remember when we went to Oklahoma city, Matthew?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I do.
Molly:
One of our famous corporate retreats. God, I miss our corporate retreats.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I know me too. We had to do our corporate retreat this year on zoom.
Molly:
We didn't ...
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Actually, this is our corporate retreat right now. You're listening to it.
Molly:
This episode is airing in mid-January. January or March is in the past when we've done our corporate retreats? Are we doing it? You just said we did our corporate retreat on zoom. You were talking about your other job?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I was trying to make a joke, but the joke didn't come together. No, I don't think you and Abby and I should do a corporate retreat on zoom.
Molly:
That sounds like recording an episode of Dire Desires.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
It sounds like recording an episode of Dire Desires, which that would be fun. But we already talk to each other all the time if we can't go anywhere, which we can't. Let's just keep doing what we're doing, unless you would, especially like to.
Molly:
Well let's-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Let's hash this all out while people are listening in.
Molly:
Let's plan a corporate retreat in 2022.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I think we said we were going to go to Winnipeg or Detroit.
Molly:
That's right. Wait, you also wanted to go to, what was the city in the Yukon territory? Is that the right name?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Whitehorse.
Molly:
Whitehorse.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. We could go to Whitehorse.
Molly:
Yeah. Sign me up.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Someday, yes.
Molly:
All right. Anyway, what I wanted to say is that the one exception to my pudding and custard dislike as a child was the [pot de creme 00:07:14] at the Metro restaurant in Oklahoma city, which is this stuffy, upper crusty restaurant that my parents used to like to go to. I think about the time that I was maybe in middle school somehow I decided that it might be safe to order a dessert there called a pot de crème. It was my first time ever encountering it.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I also had a memorable pot de creme encounter as a child.
Molly:
I loved it. You got to choose from three different sauces, either caramel sauce, chocolate sauce, or a raspberry puree. I would pretty much always choose the chocolate sauce. I think that for me was my custard gateway.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
So many things are custard. I think a pot de crème is custard.
Molly:
A pot de crème is custard. Should we get into-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah I guess so. It's thickened with eggs.
Molly:
Should we get into talking about what we're talking about when we talk about custard, that famous Murakami book?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes. Isn't that like Raymond Carver?
Molly:
Wait, what is the more Kami one? What I Think About When I Think About Running or ...?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. Something like that. Yeah, you're right.
Molly:
Murakami.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Raymond Carver, What We Talk About When-
Molly:
What I Talk About When I Talk About Running.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
The original was What We Talk About When We Talk About Love a book by Raymond Carver. How did I know that? As you know, literature not my thing. I think I should get at least a cut of the Nobel prize for remembering that that was a Raymond Carver title.
Molly:
Do you want the Nobel prize for literature or ...?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
No, just for being a trivia asshole. There's got to be one of those, right?
Molly:
Do I get the one for Murakami?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah, you do.
Molly:
I mean I got the tittle wrong but.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
We'll share the prize money obvious.
Molly:
Well, anyway, let's tell the listener what we're talking about when we talk about custard and by let's I mean, me, I'm going to tell.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes.
Molly:
At its most basic, when we're talking about custard on this episode, and I think in general, we-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Wait, okay.
Molly:
We're not talking about ... What were you going to say?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I was going to say, does that mean that when we talk about custard on a different episode, it's going to mean something different.
Molly:
Yes. When we talk about custard today, we are talking about a dish or culinary preparation made from milk or cream that is cooked with egg or egg yolk to thicken it, plus a sweetener.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
And that's it. Anything that fits those qualifications can be called a custard.
Molly:
I kind of think so. I mean, when you-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
No, I believe you.
Molly:
I mean, there are many things that are sometimes added to it. Certainly flavors vanilla, or you could steep mint in that cream. You could make a mint custard. Then of course, some starches are sometimes added flour, cornstarch, sometimes gelatin is used and these things we'll talk more about that in a second. But starch has helped stabilize the custard so does gelatin, gives it a bit of a different texture, but in general, we're talking about a milk or cream that is heated with egg and the egg thickens it into a texture that we know as custard. Now that said-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
But that texture is a wide variety of textures, really, isn't it?
Molly:
It is. It can be thin and pourable like a creme anglaise or it can be as thick as pastry cream that you could pipe out with a pastry bag, like the stuff you find in an eclair.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Right. Okay.
Molly:
Okay.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
That is how I've most often encountered custard in my life. I think not, because I'm always snuffing eclairs.
Molly:
Or Boston cream donut.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Like a Boston cream donut.
Molly:
Yeah, there you go. Custard is really easy to make, but finicky it's usually cooked in a double boiler or a bain-marie. So that it can be heated very, very gently. You can also do it in a sauce pan, but it takes real care to keep the heat gentle enough. The deal is that as you heat this milk and an egg mixture, the egg proteins coagulate, and that's what thickens it and creates this gel structure. There are emulsifiers in the egg. I presume the egg yolk that also help to maintain that structure once it's made.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
It's like you're making a really diluted, soft boiled egg.
Molly:
Really ... I don't know if I like that Matthew.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I don't either, but it's true, right?
Molly:
It is. You can imagine that this is a pretty delicate operation because eggs scrambles really easily. It doesn't take much heat to cause those proteins to set really hard and over cook, which would create lumps in your custard, like scrambled eggs in your custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Mm-hmm (affirmative). But then you can strain it, right?
Molly:
You can strain it. Yeah. The other thing that can help is, and here's where some people like to add flour or corn starch because the starch can help prevent curdling because it absorbs heat in the mixture. It can maintain a more regular and gradual transfer of heat through the mixture.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I think of, if you add starch to me that makes it a pudding. If you're going to be serving it in pudding styles.
Molly:
For sure, but a pudding is a custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I guess, maybe all puddings are custards, but not all custards are puddings.
Molly:
Exactly. Yes, there we go.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Can we rewind for just a second because you said a delicate operation and I have this obsession with trying to find ways in real life to say things that people only say in movies and TV shows. When you said that all I could imagine was you gathering the team, the mercenary team where I'd be like, I don't have to tell you folks that this is a delicate operation.
Molly:
It's a real, Oceans Eleven.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes, exactly. You would be great at leading a heist the way you just worked delicate operation into your conversation like it was nothing.
Molly:
When we talk about heist, I think of the movie Sexy Beast.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
What do we talk about when we talk about heists.
Molly:
Which then makes me think about the Ben Kingsley character, Don Logan.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
That guy was mean, I don't like it. I mean I love watching it.
Molly:
Well, and I know on the show before I've done my Don Logan imitation when he says no repeatedly, and then yes repeatedly, which I'm not going to do again, you got to find the old episode and look it up. But anyway-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Check the transcripts.
Molly:
I want to also say that custard apparently cooks quite well in a pressure cooker, which I would not have thought of.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Does that make sense?
Molly:
I don't ... I mean ...
Matthew Amster-Burton:
It's interesting because doesn't it seem the eggs would crazily overcook.
Molly:
Doesn't it? It seems so imprecise, a pressure cooker, but I guess, I don't know. But anyway just to really see exactly how ...
Matthew Amster-Burton:
What?
Molly:
How to figure this ...
Matthew Amster-Burton:
No, the heist was going so well before it was revealed that Molly is a malfunctioning robot?
Molly:
No. What I wanted to say is-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Twist.
Molly:
As our listeners know you and I are both big fans of our instant pots and I have the book Dinner In An Instant by Melissa Clark. In it, there's a short dessert chapter at the end. Guess what? All the desserts in the dessert chapter are variations of custards.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Wow.
Molly:
Yeah. We've got a butterscotch white chocolate pudding, bittersweet chocolate pudding, rice pudding, bread pudding, a creme brulee, a vanilla bean cheesecake. I think there's-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Is a cheesecake a custard? I was just going to ask that.
Molly:
Well, let's look at this. The filling has eggs and cream cheese. I'm going to argue. I did see on Wikipedia that the dairy in a custard base can be cheese. I think cheesecake is a custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Could it be an aged cheddar?
Molly:
It in theory could be I think. But that sounds gross.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
That then would be savory custard, which we're not allowed to talk about.
Molly:
No. If we had decided on this show topic more than 36 hours in advance, I would have made an instant pot custard but I didn't.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I thought you were going to say you would have refined the topic because I'm starting to get the sense that we chose for the topic of this week's episode food.
Molly:
Yes, with milk.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Because we've chosen a concept that encompasses Pot de creme cheesecake.
Molly:
Creme brulee.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Chawanmushi pudding, crème brulee.
Molly:
God why are you always bringing up chawanmushi? This is not the savory custard episode.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Next week we're doing a chawanmushi episode.
Molly:
Okay.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Try and stop us.
Molly:
All right. Can I go on?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes.
Molly:
I have a little bit of custard history, which I don't know about you, but custard history was my favorite history class in high school.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah, me too.
Molly:
It was right behind Russian history, which was actually ...
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Did you really take Russian history?
Molly:
I took Russian history in high school. It was amazing. Yeah. Russian history is-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Real custard land.
Molly:
... one of my favorite things.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
We should, I was going to say talk more about this, but I mean, should we do an episode?
Molly:
On Russian history?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Maybe we can do a Russian food and work in some of your Russian history.
Molly:
I think that sounds great. I mean, I would like to remind you that I'm 42 and I took this class when I was 17.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
But it sounds like it made a big impression?
Molly:
It did make a big impression, but I think the things that I remember tend to be the things that everybody remembers, like exactly how hard it was to kill Rasputin or how-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes, of course.
Molly:
Or Stalin's five-year plan, and what a nightmare that was.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Animal farm.
Molly:
I mean, Russian history, just time and time again is filled with delicious corruption and backwardness.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. People getting erased from photographs.
Molly:
Yes. That also ... Well that happened all over the Eastern block, but I think it's the-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Really?
Molly:
Well, yeah. I mean, have you read any Milan Kundera?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I did in high school English.
Molly:
Well, anyway, there's a book called The Book of Laughter and Forgetting by Milan Kundera, which deals a lot with ... A central image in it is this person disappearing from a photography
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I mean, it's also a central image in Back to The Future. Maybe I'll just watch that instead.
Molly:
I think it probably also happens in some Harry Potter movies.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah.
Molly:
Okay.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Well, but that's because the person just got bored of sitting in the picture and left?
Molly:
Yeah. I mean, it's not that someone was disappeared. I think I should read The Book of Laughter and Forgetting again. I read it when I was in high school and I think I didn't understand it at all, but I had moments of being like, I think I understand 10% of this and it's brilliant.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Did he also write The Unbearable Lightness of Being?
Molly:
He did, which I've never read.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Then there was a movie. I think when it came out, I got the impression that it was a sexy movie.
Molly:
I think it is a sexy movie, isn't it?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah.
Molly:
Or are we thinking of like, what else?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I mean, I don't have evidence that it isn't.
Molly:
Why didn't we watch that for Dire Desires.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah, we should watch that.
Molly:
We should do ... I don't know. Anyway, Dire Desires was too expensive for us to make anyway. We shouldn't tease ourselves with talking about doing it again. Can we get back to custard history?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes.
Molly:
Custard tarts were apparently really popular in the middle ages, and I think you can picture. [inaudible 00:18:57] picture, the old groaning spread on our middle ages table with the candles.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I love picturing the old groaning spread.
Molly:
With the candles. I mean, don't you picture this in an old castle.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
But you know what I'm picturing now is an oil painting of a huge table.
Molly:
With a dead rabbit on it?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. Weighed down with hundreds of dishes, all of which are technically custard in some way or another.
Molly:
Sure. Custard tarts were popular in the middle ages. Apparently the custard tart is where we get the English word custard, because the word comes from the French croustade, which referred to the crust of the tart. It is derived from the Italian crostata, and the Latin crustare.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
But then they took away the crust and it remained a croustade.
Molly:
Right, isn't that weird?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes.
Molly:
Anyway.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I like it.
Molly:
But Matthew our last episode, I don't remember what it was, even though we recorded it only a week ago. Wait, what was it? You read a whole bunch of stuff in middle English.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes. It was the one with the pastry coffin.
Molly:
The pastry ...
Matthew Amster-Burton:
What would that have been? Apple pie.
Molly:
Yes, apple pie. Well, Matthew, I've got some more old English words for you to read.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I could not be more ready for this.
Molly:
There's this 14th century collection of English cookery recipes. Cookery seems to be an old-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Cookery, yes.
Molly:
This collection of recipes is called The Forme of Cury. Do you think I'm pronouncing that right? You've heard of it?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes, I've heard of this title before.
Molly:
Wow. From the 13 hundreds, that's amazing to me. Anyway, there were lots of recipes for custard tarts in this book. Matthew, would you like to read the first recipe title?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Sure. Creme boiled or just crème boiled.
Molly:
Wait what about croustade of flesh.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Sorry. I skipped over the important one, croustade of flesh and croustade. Wait, no, that's two different things.
Molly:
But what you really have to draw out the S in flesh.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Right, croustade of flesh. Bring me my croustade of flesh, Jester. Now, the Jester probably wouldn't bring the croustade.
Molly:
Which would be meat or fish bound by custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Was The Court Jester a real thing?
Molly:
I don't know but I like to think so.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I like to think so too, except the impression I get from watching, I guess, a Knight's Tale or whatever, is it was a bad job because as soon as you made a mistake you'd be executed.
Molly:
Off with your head.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
It seems like one of the more difficult comedy jobs.
Molly:
Well, because I imagine all Kings behaving, like, Oh my God.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Henry the 8th.
Molly:
No, I'm thinking of Lord of The Rings, of course, the Steward of Gondor. God, what was that part?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Again, I saw just the first movie and slept through part of it.
Molly:
Right. Nevermind. But everybody out there, you know what I mean?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Everybody else knows what you mean.
Molly:
Everybody, do you remember as you can see men being killed outside, you watch him sit at this groaning spread of food and he bites into a cherry tomato and the juice flies everywhere and his mouth, the closeups of his mouth. Do you guys remember that? Oh God, that's what I imagine all kings are like.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Did you know that a cherry tomato is botanically a custard? Do you ever feel like, this is related to that being a King that if they put you in charge, you would fix everything even though everybody who's ever felt that way was extremely wrong?
Molly:
Yeah. I mean, I think that it is a prerequisite for being a human and having a human brain that you think that if you were in charge, everything would be fine. Everything would be better.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. I mean, like they wouldn't let me win on Jeopardy for sure.
Molly:
Of course they would have Matthew.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I'm the King.
Molly:
But then what would have happened when Lori came on Jeopardy? Because you would have still been on your winning streak and then who would have won?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Wow. This would have been ... Well, I mean, first of all, the ratings would have been huge.
Molly:
Amster-Burton against Amster-Burton.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
The king and queen facing off on Jeopardy. I don't know what would happen. I mean, first of all, I think she would probably win.
Molly:
I think that she would turn you into a croustade of flesh.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. First figuratively and then literally.
Molly:
Anyway, in the middle ages they were eating meat bound by custard. How do you feel about that?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Okay.
Molly:
But they also had stirred custards cooked in pots and that's the crème boiled.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I mean, you told me not to mention quiche, but a quiche with the bacon in it, that's a meat bound by custard.
Molly:
That's true. Oh, God-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Isn't bound law by something?
Molly:
God, we're talking about savory custards here though. We got to get away from it.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
That's why I said, you told me not to say it, but do I play by the rules? No, I'm the King I make the rules.
Molly:
Apparently after the revolutionary war, the American revolutionary war, the 4th of July was celebrated, of course. The foods that were served varied, but custards were among the traditional dishes in the Northern US to celebrate the 4th of July. I guess this is because-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
But was it custard tarts?
Molly:
It just says custards.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Because we already determined custards can mean anything.
Molly:
Fine, yeah, they probably just served crème anglaise and just poured it directly into their mouths on the 4th of July. Hooray independence.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
That is truly fast step.
Molly:
We can do whatever we want. We don't have to wait and pour this stuff over something else. We can just drink it down with the king.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
That's true. You think in the aftermath of the American revolution it's as if you had gotten rid of your parents, your annoying parents, and now you can do anything.
Molly:
Oh God, yeah you do everything. Yeah, totally. After we won our independence from Britain, we raided Britain's liquor cabinet. We totally, absolutely totaled its car. What else did we do?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Well, got a big stain on the rug of blood.
Molly:
Oh my God, some cigarette burns on the arms of the sofa. What else did we do?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
We probably-
Molly:
We probably blew up [Aunt Marge 00:25:45].
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Probably blew up Aunt Marge. Probably had sex in our parents room, which in this analogy means like Norfolk.
Molly:
Yeah.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Because it's northerly and that's where you folk.
Molly:
Matthew. All right, let's move on to France now that we have-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
This is why we got executed when we were court jesters.
Molly:
All right.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I mean, me specifically.
Molly:
There are lots of fancy names in French cooking, as you can imagine for different types of custard, but for reasons of my own self preservation, I've decided not to say the different names of custards in French cooking. There's a particular name for a custard that has gelatin in it. There's a particular name for a custard with beaten egg whites, I think that's-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Is one of these a sabayon?
Molly:
Actually, that's Italian, but I believe-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
No, that's zabaglione, sabayon is the French version.
Molly:
Whatever, I believe that custard with gelatin is bavarian.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I've heard that.
Molly:
I think custard with beaten egg whites as a crème chiboust or something like that. I may be totally [inaudible 00:26:56].
Matthew Amster-Burton:
That's sexy. Sounds like a [boostie 00:26:58].
Molly:
That's how I talk when I'm in Norfolk.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah exactly.
Molly:
In the UK, there are some custard-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Thanks a lot for calling back the joke that I got executed for.
Molly:
In the UK, there are some custards made without eggs.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Wait but [inaudible 00:27:13] cellar custard.
Molly:
Cellar custard. I don't know.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Okay. Wait-
Molly:
I don't know.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
You just dropped me through a trap door.
Molly:
I did just dropped that in there. It was something I got off Wikipedia. Now I wish I'd just cut it out.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Maybe let me jump in here because-
Molly:
It's like when you're writing a history paper and you find a fact that contradicts your thesis and you just leave it out.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
But you didn't leave it out, you put it in because you have ethics and it has to stop. You're never going to become the ruler if you're so ethical.
Molly:
Okay.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Let me introduce here the concept of bird's custard, because this is a egg-free custard powder in a can that is very popular in the UK. [Wotsol 00:27:53] like the show Lori got [Cylons W 00:27:55] which is sister-in-law of the show Wendy, a can of bird's custard for Christmas. I wasn't sure what it was, so I looked it up. As I said, it's an egg free imitation custard powder, Cylons W is going to use it to make a trifle if she hasn't already. But really, it's a can of corn starch, salt and artificial flavors and colors.
Molly:
Is this something that Wotsol and Cylons W have fond memories of? Why would you give someone an egg free imitation custard powder? I'm sorry, Wotsol why would you do that?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Again, you are calling out the queen.
Molly:
But usually I'm so supportive of Wotsol. I feel like it keeps things more realistic if I actually express my disdain.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I bet the answer is that Cylons W was planning to make a trifle recipe from an English cookbook that called for bird's custard powder and asked, if you're going to or ordering from a store that has bird's custard powder, can you get me some? Because it was the Christmas season, Wotsol decided to make it a gift, not just a grocery pickup. This is the scenario I've concocted.
Molly:
I think this sounds extremely plausible.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I mean, it's probably good-ish.
Molly:
I remember seeing it in the Wikipedia entry on custard, and I ignored it.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Because of ethics.
Molly:
Beaus of ethics. Because it went against my thesis. Matthew, let's get into types and uses of custards because it is ... If we haven't already blown our listeners minds with how custard is everywhere.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
The thing you're about to say is going to be so upsetting to me and possibly everyone.
Molly:
Ice cream is a custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
No, I quit. This is it.
Molly:
You actually did put your headphones down.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Sorry. For dramatic purposes. I slammed my headphones down, but then I couldn't hear if you responded to my provocation.
Molly:
Anyway, I mean, of course ice cream is a custard. I mean ice creams that contain-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Not Philadelphia style ice cream.
Molly:
Well, yeah ice creams that don't contain eggs. We can argue about that. Although, but then are you going to say that bird's custard, isn't a custard?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Well, it's a imitation custard.
Molly:
Philadelphia ice cream is to ice cream as bird's custard is to custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
But I think bird's custard is trying to imitate the custard you know, but Philadelphia style ice cream is just its own style of ice cream.
Molly:
Some might say the same of bird's custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Okay. You're right.
Molly:
Now frozen custard. This is another type and use of custard. What's the difference between ice cream made using eggs and frozen custard?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I knew the answer to this at one point and I have forgotten. Do you know?
Molly:
I don't know. I was hoping you would. That's why I wrote the question [inaudible 00:30:47].
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I mean, I know frozen custard is delicious. It's probably better than ice cream.
Molly:
Bummer. Listeners, please let us know the difference between ice cream and frozen custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
We can also look it up right now.
Molly:
You want to, you do it.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
It says that frozen custard is any dessert or non dessert that is, or is not frozen? Frozen custard is a cold dessert, similar to ice cream, but made with eggs in addition to cream and sugar. Well, that's also true of ice cream. It's usually kept at a warmer temperature compared to ice cream and typically has a denser consistency.
Molly:
This makes sense. The warmer temperature thing I can get.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Right.
Molly:
All right, another type and use of custard, pudding. This is custard that has a starch added to it. Creme anglaise we already discussed this. This would be a pourable custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
You know where I've had this many years ago in the early two thousands. I went to new Orleans and ate at Commander's Palace and they have this signature dessert where they make a bread pudding and then they burst it open and pour custard in it. It's so ridonkulous.
Molly:
Creme anglaise is quite often served with bread pudding, which is custard with custard, but we'll get there in just a minute.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Okay.
Molly:
Pot de creme, which we discussed earlier, this is a baked custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I think chocolate pot de crème is probably one of my favorite desserts. I don't make it very often, but it's very good.
Molly:
I love butterscotch pots de creme, which I have not made in years. Creme caramel, this is ... Sometimes isn't it called a crème [French 00:32:20] upside down.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Like a reverse, yeah.
Molly:
Yeah, so that ...
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Or a flan.
Molly:
Or like a flan. So, that the caramel liquid caramel runs down over it.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
This was a dessert I was afraid of as a kid.
Molly:
Me too, big time. No way would I get near that.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I don't know what I thought, once I tasted it, I was okay, this is just dessert. But why was I so afraid of that?
Molly:
Were you afraid of the jiggle?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Maybe I was afraid of the jiggle. But what's the thing I'm afraid of now, that if I just took a long, hard look at myself, I would realize the fear didn't need to be inside me. It's not egg salad because my fear there is justified.
Molly:
I don't know.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Killer robots?
Molly:
No, that's probably justified.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah.
Molly:
Matthew, can I move on to the next one?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Please.
Molly:
All right. I think creme caramel and flan we're going to say for our purposes here on the show, they're roughly the same. I'm sure a lot of people are going to disagree, but anyway, pastry cream or crème patisserie, like, you'd find in a Boston cream donut, a cream [inaudible 00:33:21]. Yeah.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Or in a custard cream donut at Mr. Donut.
Molly:
Yes. Then Matthew, let's talk about bread pudding, which basically is bread baked in a custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
It's like the meat bound with custard of the middle ages with bread in place of meat.
Molly:
It's frequently served with creme anglaise poured over it, which is how you get custard served with custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. Do I like that? I don't think I actually enjoy eating it very much, but I like the concept.
Molly:
It's one of those things that I would never make, and I would never really order. I mean, if I were going to restaurants, but if somebody else ordered it ...
Matthew Amster-Burton:
If someone left it at the table next to you, and you would lean over with your folk.
Molly:
Like that time at my cousin's wedding when I was 20 and I went around and ate strangers wedding cakes slices that they had left to get up and go dance.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Why did you do that? I want to hear the story.
Molly:
It was a really good cake. Also, it was my first time actually drinking a cocktail and more than one cocktail.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
This all makes sense.
Molly:
I think I had just turned 21. At this wedding, this was 1999. They had two signature drinks. One was Manhattans, which I found terrifying and disgusting. Which I no longer find terrifying or disgusting. The other was a cosmopolitan. I drank a cosmopolitan, felt very silly. I loved the wedding cake they had. It was possibly the best wedding cake I've ever had. It was just a really good cake. It had this incredible raspberry mousse in the center of the two layers. As people got up and started dancing, I took my fork and I went around and ate unfinished pieces of cake. I think this was after my second cocktail.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Did this cause a problem with the wedding photos? Because you're a shadowy figure at the background of every one stabbing cake with a fork drunkenly.
Molly:
Not that I know of, but I'll ask my cousin.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Because I would love ... Is there a video from this day so that we could post?
Molly:
There's not a video. I'm pretty sure there's me dancing. I also developed a massive crush on my cousin's best man, who was God at that point probably eight years older than me. I probably seemed a wee young baby thing because he was 29 and I was still in college. That's a big deal.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
That's a big difference.
Molly:
Anyway, but I had such a crush on him and-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I wasn't being judgemental about your crush ...
Molly:
No, I feel a bit embarrassed about it now. I mean, did you ever do that questionable wedding behavior? You go to a family wedding, you get a crush on somebody. I didn't do anything bad. I just fond all over this person all night. Then the next day was like I'm an idiot.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
No, not really. I think by the time I went to ... I think my second wedding was my own.
Molly:
That's right. Of course, Boston cream pie, cream pies in general, and then Portuguese egg tarts.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I love Portuguese egg tarts.
Molly:
They're so good.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
So good. I'm most familiar with the Hong Kong style ones, which are usually served warm or even hot. They are fantastic.
Molly:
The Portuguese ones are often allowed to darken on top, right?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Right, the Hong Kong ones, usually aren't the ones from neighboring Macau usually are. I don't know if I've ever had one that was ... Well, okay I've had one in Japan that was brown on top. That was described as Portuguese style. That was very good.
Molly:
I think that this was the kind of thing that I used to have a lot of energy for making early in my blogging days. I seem to remember making custard tarts and writing about it on my blog.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I mean, we could probably find that.
Molly:
I used to make a lot more tarts and things. I so rarely make things with multiple steps now.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Here we go.
Molly:
Is that my blog?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. The title of the post is pate brisee for a pillow, February, 2005.
Molly:
Wow. Everyone, I was 26 years old.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
The recipe, it's an Alsatian onion tart.
Molly:
No. Then that's a different post. There's a different one where I think I made actual some version of a custard tart.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I believe you. Because like the best man speech, it's something I've seen in movies a lot. But do people really do that, where the goal is to embarrass the groom?
Molly:
Yes.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Because I don't like that idea.
Molly:
I don't like that either.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I feel if I was the best man, which I never have been. I feel like I was being tasked with getting up and saying, you know this guy he's made a lot of mistakes. I'm going to tell you all about them.
Molly:
Or he's fucked around a lot.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah.
Molly:
It's so weird, the speeches people give at weddings.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
He probably stuck his dick in a lot of places he shouldn't have early on today.
Molly:
A lot of bowls of custard, you know what I mean?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. American pie am I right?
Molly:
Gross.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
We're good at this.
Molly:
We're good at this.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
You hire us for your wedding.
Molly:
It's a really good thing. Ash and I were supposed to be having a party to celebrate because we sort of eloped to New York. I don't know if you can call it elopement if you bring your mother.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Probably not.
Molly:
But anyway, then we were going to have a party in August of 2020 to celebrate our marriage. Of course it was canceled because of COVID. But anyway, Matthew all this to say, whenever we do have that party, you're not allowed to give that kind of best man speech.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I'm not even going to be invited.
Molly:
There's not going to be any wedding party. God I wonder if that means that everybody's going to think they're the best man. They get to stand up and say dumb shit.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. I mean you should put like, no gifts, no speeches.
Molly:
Except I do love the speeches.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
No, you were going to say I kind of would have want gifts.
Molly:
But you know what is the bummer though? If you elope, even with your mother, if you elope-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
If you elope with your mother that's illegal.
Molly:
Then if you throw a wedding party for yourself and your spouse, but then if you cancel it because of a pandemic, no one gives you gifts.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah, I could see that.
Molly:
It's fine, whatever. It's totally fine, but yeah, it's also a little sad.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I understand.
Molly:
But it's fine. I'm over it. Clearly, I'm so over it.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I hear what you're saying, like check the mail.
Molly:
All right. Matthew let's move on trifles. Of course, as you mentioned, when we were talking about bird's custard trifles, use custard. Floating islands, have you ever had floating islands?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I know of it as a fancy dessert, but I've never had it. Of the old school, what would be considered fancy desserts in the ... I don't know I was going to say the fifties, but maybe, I mean like the twenties. Floating Island, baked Alaska, bananas foster, crepes suzette. We made bananas foster for the show and it's delicious. I don't know if I've ever had any of the others.
Molly:
I have had floating islands. In French, they're oeufs a la neige, eggs in snow and they are delicious.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Wait, so it's not called ile flottante, in French?
Molly:
Wait, it is sometimes called ile flottante.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I know I've heard that but ...
Molly:
Wait a minute let me make sure that ouefs a la neige is what I think it is.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I mean, there can be multiple names for the same dessert.
Molly:
Ouefs a la neige is also floating Island, but you're right, it's also called ile flottante. But anyway, it is so much more delicious than you would think it is. It's extremely delicious. In fact, when I was living with a host family and my parents came to visit me at one point and we went to one of those old school, French restaurants, [French 00:41:14], which is in the [French 00:41:16] it's the kind of place that has a cheese chariot.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Okay, I got it.
Molly:
You could order ile flottante for dessert and you better believe I did. It's so much tastier than it seems, poached murang on a bed of crème anglaise.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. I'd like to try it. It sounds so unlikely that I want to get in there.
Molly:
It's too bad that I'm not still in my early days of blogging and being single and not having a child and wanting to cook to escape from grad school.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I smell a time machine adventure.
Molly:
Because I mean, I think I once considered making ile flottante at home. I was that kind of person. It's not difficult. You make a creme anglaise, you make a murang with a certain amount of sugar in it. Then you shape it into balls or canals or whatever you're capable of shaping it into and you poach it. Then you can make a-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
No, that sounds quite difficult.
Molly:
You can make a caramel sauce for the top.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah, no I'm not going to be doing this.
Molly:
Matthew, when COVID is over, maybe we'll have a working lunch at my house.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
And you'll make an ile flottante.
Molly:
I'll make an ile flottante, just as a way of celebrating that COVID is over.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Okay, yeah. You're on.
Molly:
I mean, or that we've been vaccinated. I don't know if COVID will truly ever be over, but we'll be vaccinated at least. By the way this show is pro-vaccine.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. I think they should give you ile flottante like how they give you cookies when you give blood. When you get your vaccine, they should give you a certificate and a individual serving of floating islands?
Molly:
Do you get it with both shots or only after the second one?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes, no, you get floating Island with the first one and crepes suzette with the second one, even though probably you shouldn't be [flambaying 00:43:01] things in the vaccine tent.
Molly:
Cool. All right.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
You wrote frangipane and zabaglione.
Molly:
Frangipane, I saw this mentioned multiple times on the internet that frangipane was referred to as a custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I saw that too. It's like an almond thing.
Molly:
Yeah. It has egg in it, but also butter. Are they considering butter the milk product?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I mean, it is, right?
Molly:
It just seems very questionable to call that a custard.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Now, all of a sudden you're drawing lines around custard?
Molly:
Then zabaglione which is ... What is the alcohol that's in zabaglione?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Is it Marsala?
Molly:
I think you're right. That's a custard that's flavored with alcohol.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
What do you do with it? I know it because it's a fun word to say, and I like Italian food and I don't know if I've ever had it.
Molly:
I feel like it shows up at old school, Italian joints where it's served in oversize martini glass with berries.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
It shows up at old school, Italian joints. It bribes the maitre d and demands a table.
Molly:
Yeah. Just like that. Basically, yes, everyone, custard is everywhere. It is the air we breathe. It is the water in our bathtub. It's the water under our floating islands.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
It's the water in our bathtub. I almost just let that flow by like a draining bathtub. Have you ever made bathtub gin? When I was a kid for a time, my absolute favorite movie in the world was Annie. There was a part in there where I think Ms. Hannigan was making bathtub gin in the bathtub at the orphanage. I was like, I want to know all about this. This seems like a cool thing that grownups do.
Molly:
Did Annie take place during prohibition?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I believe so. I think that would make sense. I think the thirties, twenties.
Molly:
Wow, this is really been our history episode. We've been promising, we've had a little bit of Russian history. We have talked about people being disappeared. We have discussed prohibition and Ms. Hannigan.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. We talked about historical movies, like Back To The Future.
Molly:
Historical desserts like ile flottante.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
That means we just have time for one more segment, which is cute animals you need to know.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I'm going to send you this week's video. I'm going to text it to you right now.
Molly:
Okay. Abby wants us to put these in the agenda, Matthew.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yes. This time though, I already sent it to Abby because we're breaking new ground with the segment because for the first time ever ... I mean, we're breaking new ground in multiple dimensions because this is a video that I shot. It's the first time we're featuring a cute animal that is not an animal and is not even alive.
Molly:
Did you make a Spilled Milk YouTube channel?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
We already had a Spilled Milk YouTube channel.
Molly:
For our training video.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
That's where we posted our training video, seven years ago.
Molly:
Here we go. Okay, wait, this is a cute ...
Matthew Amster-Burton:
The cute animal you need to know this week is tofu, silken tofu specifically, and more specifically a piece of silken tofu that I ate the other night when we made sukiyaki for dinner. Teenager, the show December noticed, who has a new name by the way, noticed that a piece of tofu was jiggling in a very funny way. Hey, jiggling it's totally on topic for this episode. I said, that could be the cute animal of the week. I pulled out my phone and we will include the link in the show notes. You can see this little piece of tofu that can, or at least could, right before I eat it.
Molly:
Have you also noticed that it looks like it has eyes and then it jiggles like there's a center line, like a mouth a little bit?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. I see what you mean.
Molly:
Oh my God, it's so cute.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
If you don't usually watch our cute animal videos, you should watch this one because it's nine seconds long.
Molly:
It's so cute.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
It's in HD.
Molly:
I should load it up on our TV so I can-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
You should, get this up on. You do have a 78 inch screen.
Molly:
We bought a TV on OfferUp during this COVID time.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
What does that mean?
Molly:
It's like Craigslist. It's a place where you can list stuff you're trying to sell and you can put a price on it, but people can also counter with their offer. Anyway, we had a quite small TV-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
You can't put a price on entertainment.
Molly:
We had a quite small TV, if you were sitting on the ground, watching it, you couldn't see anything. It was the kind of thing we had to be right in front of it to see it. We bought-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Then no one else could see it because everyone was standing right in front of it.
Molly:
We bought a larger TV that is much nicer for 40 bucks on OfferUp.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Nice.
Molly:
You better believe I want to watch this cute tofu on our large TV.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah. No, that is serendipitous.
Molly:
Yeah. Wow. This has been a wild, exhausting [night 00:48:01].
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Do I feel like I learned more about custard during the last six hours that we spent together talking about custard. Not sure. I feel like I learned something.
Molly:
I mean, I think that the thesis is also the conclusion, which is that custard is everywhere.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
If you said to me, "Hey, let's go out for custard." I wouldn't know what to expect.
Molly:
I wish that we could go out for frozen custard right now. Matthew, do you remember when we used to go out for frozen custard? When we used to do-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I do. I think that place is permanently closed.
Molly:
Do you remember when we used to do things friends do?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah.
Molly:
Like, you would accidentally see me without my shirt on in the bathroom mirror.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah, friend things.
Molly:
Do you remember how mortifying that was to us? That wouldn't be that mortifying to me now, maybe because we've gone to the new beach together.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I think it was more mortifying to you than to me.
Molly:
It was quite mortifying to me-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Because I didn't have to say anything.
Molly:
I didn't know that it had happened when it was happening. Then later you were like-
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Not much later.
Molly:
I don't really even remember how you told me, but I think I was pretty ...
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I'm going to send you a timeline.
Molly:
Okay.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I mean, I think definitely, I told you in the most awkward, possible way. Because how else could it have gone down?
Molly:
I think pretty much everything you tell me is pretty awkward.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Yeah, pretty much.
Molly:
Okay.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
All right. You can find us online, Spilledmilkpodcast.com. We're on Reddit. Our unofficial Reddit discussion group is reddit.com/r/everything Spilledmilk.
Molly:
Wait, can I really quickly thank all of our listeners who have been active on our Reddit thread, Reddit area?
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Our subreddit.
Molly:
Our subreddit, lately.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I'd like to thank everyone who's been active in our area.
Molly:
Wait a minute, we also need to say Matthew, that this episode was suggested on our subreddit by Tired Rundown Listless.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
That's great. Thank you, Tired Rundown Listless. I hope this puts some pep in your step.
Molly:
Also thank you to everyone who chimed in to help me with my red wine problem on Reddit. This makes me really happy. So thanks guys.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Thank you just to everyone who listens to our show. You don't have to do that.
Molly:
No.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
We appreciate it. I mean, we're not trying to talk you out of it.
Molly:
No.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
You can all be the best man at our wedding. When inevitably Molly and I marry each other someday and I mean, best man not in a gendered way, just like you can get up and give a speech about how we're bad.
Molly:
Okay, great.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
I'm Matthew Amster-Burton, and our producer is Abby Cerquitella.
Molly:
I'm Molly.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
If we were at Abby's wedding, we would both get up and give a speech about how great Abby is.
Molly:
Oh my God, Abby is the best person involved in this show.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
For sure.
Molly:
Out of the three of us Abby is the best person.
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Bye.
Molly:
Bye.
Molly:
[inaudible 00:51:04].
Matthew Amster-Burton:
Okay, so ...