Today we reveal our aches, our pains and our skincare regimens before chatting with Pailin Chongchitnant about the concept of salad and Mama's noodles. Finally, we cope with food (and foot) related injuries with rage screams, moral quandaries and humble brags.
CW: Deceased Animal Mention
Episode 479: Fish Sauce with Pailin Chongchitnant
Episode 456: Pad Thai with Pailin Chongchitnant
Pailin Chongchitnant
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Molly 0:00
Hi. I'm Matthew and I'm Molly.
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:06
And this is Spilled Milk, the show where we cook something delicious. Eat it all and you can't have
Molly 0:10
any. Today we are talking about Thai salads, again,
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:14
Thai salads,
Molly 0:15
to Thai salads to when was Thai salads one.
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:18
Thai salads was in 2011 Oh my god.
Molly 0:22
There are just times when you're when I'm reminded of exactly how old this show is.
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:27
Uh huh. Yeah, it's, we're getting up on our 100th year, right? What are we for centennial?
Molly 0:32
Well, you know, my knee and I just marked our centennial. My knee recently reminded me how old I am. Can I tell you about my boring orthopedic issues?
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:42
Oh, yeah. You're gonna get it replaced? Well, no, I
Molly 0:45
had like, random just like a swollen knee.
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:49
Sure. That sounds like something that would happen to this person in knee but
Molly 0:52
with no pain, and no injury. And I think I had some sort of a viral infection in my knee.
Matthew Amster-Burton 1:00
Are you sure you're not just getting swole?
Molly 1:03
I am starting to get ripped for summer.
Matthew Amster-Burton 1:05
Yeah, that's so important.
Molly 1:07
We all are. Yeah. Anyway, my knee just decided to remind me that I'm that I'm, you know, officially middle aged, but it has subsided now.
Matthew Amster-Burton 1:16
I'm happy. That's good. Yeah, yeah. Did you did you get it looked at?
Molly 1:20
I did. Our longtime family doctor is a good friend. And she happened to come by to meet the baby. And I otherwise would not have been able to get in to see her for a long time. And she checked out my knee and was like, this is such a true medical mystery.
Matthew Amster-Burton 1:35
Did she just for a moment when you said it while you're here? Can you check out my swollen knee? Did she make a face like fuck you?
Molly 1:41
I didn't feel bad about it. Every time I see her, I'm like, just check out my thing. This other thing?
Matthew Amster-Burton 1:50
I don't know. Like I imagined probably some some doctors kind of get a kick out of that. Like, I'm sure it's annoying. Always annoying sometimes. But
Molly 1:57
I don't remember anybody doing it with my dad. But I guess it's because my dad was a cancer doctor. So you don't really want him to ever have to check you out. Yeah, that's
Matthew Amster-Burton 2:06
right. Yeah. Like, do not look at this thing. I don't want to know.
Molly 2:10
Anyway, but so just like the show, my knee is really old. Okay, and it's my knee is almost ready to do kneecap to.
Matthew Amster-Burton 2:19
Yeah, one like, let's let's just do a tour of like, all the things about me that are all like, Okay, I had this I had this this conversation recently with the wife of the show Laurie where we, you know, we always like you know, on off like, let each other know like, like, you know, I'll still think you're just as good looking when you're old and wrinkly. And like realizing like oh, say wait a minute, like we're wrinkly and a lot of places now this is not like a future thing. This is a now thing.
Molly 2:46
have you guys gotten into doing a skincare regimen together? That could be romantic.
Matthew Amster-Burton 2:51
That's a good idea. Like I've not we've talked about this before that like I'm not this is a great episode. So this episode already, people like listeners have learned so much about Thai salad. Like I've never really gotten into a skincare routine of any kind. I do have this this moisturizing lotion that I use when my skin gets really dry and flaky and winter which it does sometimes called Neutrogena hydroboost Oh cool. So I make up all these little songs about hydroboost oh my god
Molly 3:20
that's delightful. You know I don't really have a skincare regimen either. I mean I have a cleanser I've used in a drugstore moisturizer I use but my skincare secret is the dermatologist Yeah, of course. Okay. What's
Matthew Amster-Burton 3:37
What's her secret?
Molly 3:38
The dermatologist? Okay, so
Matthew Amster-Burton 3:40
that was memory lane.
Molly 3:41
That was memory lane so yeah, why are we doing Thai salads again?
Matthew Amster-Burton 3:45
Let me tell you it's because friend of the show pi Lin of the Hot Thai Kitchen YouTube channel has a new book out called sub pie which is not just about Thai salads is like a you know kind of you know weeknight Thai cooking book that covers like the full range of Thai cuisine. But wow did the salads chapter jumped out at us as like we want to make all of these things
Molly 4:07
you know I can testify to this Matthew has regularly been texting me ever since he got I think a galley of pylons book Matthew has been texting me like made another Thai salad. Made another Thai salad it was great but yeah and
Matthew Amster-Burton 4:20
I haven't brought you any of them like it was a real you can't have any moment it was terrible like you're you're you've been living our listeners nightmare
Molly 4:28
i have i have so Matthew hold on we should also say that you know I'm really happy to have Pineland on the show again actually we oh yeah, this is your third time because pilot is excellent. And plus pilot just knows way much way much more about this way much. Yeah, then then we do. We were young and stupid. In 2011 thinking we could do this episode without now
Matthew Amster-Burton 4:50
we're old and wrinkly with plump lips.
Molly 4:53
That's right. And so we've got pipe Lin here to help us. She's going to join us here in a second. So Matthew, you know What What's your your update on Thai salads since 2011? In terms of like memory lane?
Matthew Amster-Burton 5:05
Oh, I still love them. Yeah, like I've been I've been I've made for Thai salads since since they sent me pilots new book, which was not very long ago, including I improvised one and I was so proud of myself.
Molly 5:17
Oh, that's fantastic. I will admit that I have not been making many Thai salads lately. You have no excuse. I truly have no excuse. Except, except that technically as we're recording this episode, I'm still on parental leave. Yeah. Which means I don't have to make any food I don't want to
Matthew Amster-Burton 5:33
it also means I'm a terrible boss.
Molly 5:36
Yeah, so I'm just I'm hoping that the next time you decide to bring me and my family dinner on the meal train that you bring me a Thai salad. Okay, so Matthew, what Thai salads did we talk about in 2011? Did we talk about like green papaya salad, mango salad
Matthew Amster-Burton 5:53
I talked about like, like, you know, a beef salad like a yum Nua like a psalm Tom green papaya salad and lob. I'm sure that makes sense. That makes sense, which I think are kind of like the big three Thai salads that you you would have heard of if you've been to a Thai American restaurant or Thai restaurant outside Thailand. As as we will see like the the world of Thai salads within Thailand is much much broader than that as you might expect. Great.
Molly 6:21
And Matthew How do you find that the salads at least the ones that you've been making from pilots new book how do they work in terms of like the produce that's available in Seattle in the wintertime? Have you had any trouble
Matthew Amster-Burton 6:33
we should we should for sure talk to talk to the pilot about this cuz she's she's in Vancouver BC, so is has access to the same produce as us pretty much I mean, they work really really well. Like you know, I've done I did like a cabbage salad that she talks about in the book how like her her mom used to make it when she couldn't get green papaya in Canada. And it's fantastic. I made I the one that I improvised. It was just like a real like fridge clean out I had like half an English cucumber. I had some romaine lettuce and some steak and like made one of the dressings from the book and tossed it together and made some toasted rice powder and like toss that all together. I'm gonna repeat this again because I want pyland to be proud of me for him for improvising a Thai salad Okay, great. How about you like you know are Do you still like Thai salads or Have you have you turned on them?
Molly 7:21
Oh, no, I still like Thai salads. In fact, each photo you've sent me of your your Thai sounds made you more and more angry maybe made me feel more and more left out and fat? Sure. Yeah. All right. Well, let's welcome on PI Lin.
Matthew Amster-Burton 7:38
We are delighted to have once again friend of the show pilot chun chun Nan whose new book syllabi 100 Simple Thai recipes for any day of the week is out March 14. preorder it anywhere you get books right now pile in Welcome back to spilled milk.
Pailin Chongchitnant 7:52
Thank you for having me. Always happy to be here.
Matthew Amster-Burton 7:54
We are delighted. Okay, so we're talking this is actually our second Thai salads episode. We did one back in 2011. We don't really mean
Molly 8:05
it was a grave error.
Matthew Amster-Burton 8:07
Yeah, like I know, like I've been I've been like doing penance ever since?
Molly 8:11
Is this book only salad recipes? Why are we talking about Thai salads? Today?
Matthew Amster-Burton 8:15
This book is not only salad recipes by a longshot. It is a full service, kind of weekday Thai cooking book that covers all aspects of Thai cuisine. But wow, did I immediately jump on this salad chapter because there's so much good stuff in it. Like I wanted to make every every recipe and I've made three of them so far. Oh, you did? What did you make? So I made the Chinese sausage salad. Oh, yeah.
Pailin Chongchitnant 8:40
That was one recipe that when I wrote that, I was like, no one's going to make this. Well. You are you have proven me wrong.
Matthew Amster-Burton 8:48
One one weird. Okay, let's okay, we wrote a bunch of questions. But let's let's just go off script immediately. Like, is that a salad that people eat in Thailand? Is that something that you invented?
Pailin Chongchitnant 8:59
No, this is a salad. That's very common in Thailand. Okay. It's very basic. And the reason why I said I didn't think anyone would make it because it just seems so weird. You know, like, I didn't think like a non Thai person coming across that they'd be like, I would like to try that. Because it's like Chinese sausage is not something people envision in the salad. Yes, you're right. And so as I mentioned, I think in the head note, this is something we often eat with rice porridge, okay. If you've made the salad, you know that it's got lots of strong flavors. It's tart. It's sweet. It's salty, it's chewy, there's so much texture. And so it really needs sort of like a luscious carb dish, like plain rice porridge to go with it. And it's a very common breakfast item in Thailand. Yeah, that
Matthew Amster-Burton 9:44
makes sense. It sounds
Molly 9:45
fantastic. Yeah, I
Matthew Amster-Burton 9:46
had it with just with jasmine rice and and then had it again for breakfast the next day, and it was great. Matthew, what
Molly 9:53
other salads Have you made from the book? Okay,
Matthew Amster-Burton 9:55
I've made the pounded cabbage slaw, which, like I don't even remember What we ate it with because it was so much the main event because it's so good. Right? And the warm mama noodle salad
Pailin Chongchitnant 10:07
that was found Mama.
Matthew Amster-Burton 10:11
Oh, yeah, I was making tons of mama jokes. Well, well.
Pailin Chongchitnant 10:16
Yeah, no, those are all those are all really great dishes that you picked. Have you ever had Thai green papaya salad before? Yes. So did this law? Was that reminiscent of that?
Matthew Amster-Burton 10:26
Yeah, it really was tells it like how do you pronounce like the name of the of the green papaya salad into green
Pailin Chongchitnant 10:32
papaya salad. Yeah, is called some thumb. Okay. Yeah. So sometime and the word thumb means to pound in a mortar and pestle. And so we have so many different kinds of thumb. And you can make a thumb out of basically anything. But cabbage is a really great one. Because it's it's widely available. And we always need reasons to use up cabbage, don't we? All right. It's crunchy and neutral enough to be such a perfect pairing with this dressing. Yeah,
Molly 11:01
well, so I want to backtrack a tiny bit. What is it that you think of as constituting? Like, what's a Thai salad? And is there like a single word for salad in Thai? Or is this a concept that you know that like we're bringing to these dishes and lumping them together?
Pailin Chongchitnant 11:20
So there's no word in Thai that will directly translate to salad. Okay, so this idea of tossing ingredients together with a dressing, there's no one word for that. But we have categories of dishes, that would be considered a salad in the Western sense. Okay. Right. But like the word salad in the West is so open ended, right? You can make it you can make anything with any dressing, and it's a salad. But if you were to make put Thai ingredients randomly together, and not following any of these sort of existing categories, we would not know what to call it, right. Like there can't be no word for that thing that you've just made.
Matthew Amster-Burton 12:02
So what what are the categories we talked about Tom?
Pailin Chongchitnant 12:05
Yeah, so Tom is a category. So it's a pound salad. It's always made in a mortar and pestle. And then the basic one is yum. So yum. You probably if you go to a Thai restaurant, there's definitely a Yum, something. Yeah. And yum is the most generic salad. You can make it out of anything, but the dressing is always fish sauce, live juice, sugar and chilies. Okay, and it's usually protein centric, we usually make yum with meat or eggs or something like that. And then there's lab also very popular, which by the way, I like to say it is not larb. Yeah, so I'm guilty of that. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm so sorry. And it started out with the English speakers with British accents. And that's fine. Okay. But when Americans start using that same spelling, they pronounced the R and it becomes larb, which is totally wrong. So I've been trying to preach that it's L A, B so that regardless of what accent you have, you are going to say it correctly. Okay, so, lob is another kind of salad that is usually made with ground meat. And it's very specific. The dressing is very specific, but the key ingredient in there is toasted rice powder. So you toss up some raw rice until it's nice and brown, and then grind it up. And that is like the identity of love.
Matthew Amster-Burton 13:26
Okay, can I tell you about the Franken salad that I improvised? Yeah, after after making those three recipes, we had like a bunch of stuff left. So I made a salad with it was kind of the dressing from the from the pounded cabbage slaw, but with hazel dots instead of peanuts. Romaine lettuce, English, cucumber, steak, and toasted rice powder. That sounds like it would be delicious. It was incredibly. But it was started. It sounds like a lob yum. Hybrid. Oh,
Pailin Chongchitnant 13:58
that does sound like it.
Molly 13:59
Is this one of those dishes that like has no word. Yeah, that was.
Matthew Amster-Burton 14:04
Yeah, as soon as you said that was like, oh, yeah, I did this
Pailin Chongchitnant 14:07
random salad with no name.
Matthew Amster-Burton 14:10
Okay. One thing I was wondering is whether whether a Thai salad always involves lime juice, or there are some, okay,
Pailin Chongchitnant 14:16
always 100% of the time. Sometimes it's lime juice in combination with tamarind. But it there's never any vinegar, as one might expect. We don't use vinegar. hardly at all in Thai cuisine. Once in a while. We'll use white vinegar here and there. But generally,
Molly 14:35
to what degree do these salads vary regionally? Quite a bit,
Pailin Chongchitnant 14:39
the yum the generic type of salad, yum, that's all over the country we eat everybody eats that. But lab, for example, is a northeastern salad. So that's where it came from. So Laos, they have their own version of lab as well. They would probably argue that it is originally Laos. However, it's spread out All over the country now that anywhere you are you can you can find a lab so it's not it had regionals origins, but now most outlets are available all over the country.
Matthew Amster-Burton 15:11
Sure. You have a recipe in the book for leftover anything lob, which, like so I'm wondering like how that's your Franken salad. It's kind of my friend gets out so so yeah, I already did this apparently but like how do I love anything I've got like which which leftovers really worked best.
Pailin Chongchitnant 15:28
So the concept of leftover anything lab came from my realization that lab is consistent with the exception of the protein. Right? Whatever kind of lab you make, it's the same ingredients. It's fish sauce, lime juice, chilies, toasted rice powder, and a bunch of herbs. And people make lab with all sorts of things. And I wonder well, what if I make lab with leftover things? Yeah. And it turns out it works incredibly well. Especially like bland roasted things like rotisserie chicken, like the inside of a rotisserie chicken doesn't have any flavor. Or like leftover bits of roast beef or steak or whatever it happens to be and it's stale. And if you reheat it's definitely overcooked now, that gets shredded up. And the strong flavors of a lab dressing will like make you forget about whatever flaws it would have had.
Matthew Amster-Burton 16:23
So I feel like the thing that makes it a lot one of the things that makes it a lob dressing like in addition to the rice powder is like it doesn't have sugar. No I like so like many, many Thai salad dressings have like like palm sugar pounded in, but loss does not.
Pailin Chongchitnant 16:38
Yeah, and that's definitely a sign that it is a North Eastern salad because in the northeast, they don't eat food with much sugar. Okay, and so lap doesn't have a lot of sugar, which also makes it important to to make sure that you have enough toasted rice powder in there to sort of mellow out the acid and the fish sauce. If you don't have enough, it will it'll be very sharp. It'll be too sharp, surest,
Molly 17:01
okay, okay.
Pailin Chongchitnant 17:03
Some people like to add a little bit of sugar just because like, you know, just because sugar is good, just because sugar is good. And it does help balance out all those sharp edges. So you don't have to worry so much about getting everything right. But it's, you know, theoretically wrong if food can be wrong. But I try not to because you know what, we add sugar to almost everything. So why not just skip this for once?
Molly 17:27
I wondered if you could tell us a little bit about the book sort of as a whole, because, you know, we're just focused on salads today. But the book is so much more than that. So will you talk a little bit more about the concept behind this book, and maybe what you're most proud of in terms of the recipes in it?
Pailin Chongchitnant 17:43
Yeah, so the title is sabae, which is my favorite Thai word. It's like, if you go to Thailand, you'll hear people say it. It's the idea of being at ease and relaxed and carefree. And you can refer to your body being so by your mind being so by your just everything is the bicep i
Matthew Amster-Burton 18:02
i have to experience this feeling someday
Pailin Chongchitnant 18:06
when you're retiring to Thailand device. So my first book, when I wrote that it was a little bit hardcore, I was like, I had all this knowledge I wanted to share, I wanted to like make it like textbook II about Thai food, I included all these recipes that use all sorts of weird ingredients. But I didn't care because it was all about like establishing what Thai food is all about. And then I became a mom. And then suddenly, I had never appreciated the value of just simple, quick recipes that are just hard to screw up, you know. And so when I when I was thinking about a second book, I was like, You know what, I don't have that for people. It's not like if you go onto my website, it's not clear which recipe is simple and straightforward. You kind of have to go through them. And look, I wanted like a book where you grab this off the shelf, everything in there is going to be pretty simple to do. Yeah, so I want it like a resource for people to be able to turn to on a weeknight. And that's sort of the idea behind syllabi, or even
Matthew Amster-Burton 19:09
if you have a new baby in the house.
Pailin Chongchitnant 19:11
Yeah,
Molly 19:12
for sure. Excellent. Excellent.
Matthew Amster-Burton 19:15
That's definitely like I found like, you know that all of the recipes that I've made from the book so far were just like so easy to jump into because I make you know, we had you on to talk pod tie years ago and like I still make that recipe all the time and is one of my favorite things to make. But it's a bit of a production.
Pailin Chongchitnant 19:31
It's a bit of a production. And you know, it's interesting, I did include a patch in this book as well because I like because I feel like I but it was on what I call the minimalist peptide. It's like I'm taking out everything that I don't think is necessary, but this is what's left. So if you want to make a pot tie that's still good, but like as fast free as possible. This is it like it taking out any more. It's gonna start to mess with
Matthew Amster-Burton 19:58
it. I'm imagining you vid realize it like this this like white person returned to return the book at Barnes and Nobles saying there's no pod Thai recipe and
Pailin Chongchitnant 20:08
you know what? That is? Definitely something
Matthew Amster-Burton 20:12
would happen you're right.
Pailin Chongchitnant 20:15
Or like no green curry, right? What kind of a thigh cookbook is this?
Matthew Amster-Burton 20:21
So I made that warm warm mama noodle salad. It was great. It's like it's like a yum wound Sen but but with, like, you know, instant ramen noodles instead of glass noodles. In the head out you say like, it is so important to get the actual Thai mama brand noodles like what is special about these noodles,
Pailin Chongchitnant 20:38
the flavor and the texture is not like any other brand of instant ramen noodles. So if you substitute, it's a completely different dish. And the problem is I think my my noodles are the noodles themselves have quite a bit of seasoning in them. So they're not DeLand in enough themselves. So have you substituted with another brand that doesn't season their noodles to the same extent? The salad is going to end up being a little bit not as flavorful as it's supposed to be. That is my main concern with this is why I thought it was so important is it's the seasoning level that's in the noodles. Yep. They haven't you can eat mama raw. You can like crush it up and just eat it like snack. They're that good.
Matthew Amster-Burton 21:22
I mean you can you can do that with any ramen. Instant Ramen Noodles technically.
Molly 21:31
Yeah, Matthew, I have a question for you. Okay, did you have any trouble finding those noodles here in Seattle?
Matthew Amster-Burton 21:38
I got them just at the Safeway down the street for me. Oh my god. Okay perfect. The in the Asian foods aisle. Okay. International. Right. Exactly. Yes. Which is which is also the Hispanic foods aisle.
Pailin Chongchitnant 21:51
Yeah, Mama is surprisingly available even at non nation store. Yeah, no,
Matthew Amster-Burton 21:56
I was pleased like they have a really good selection of instant noodles at Safeway. Like they have the mama they have like the Korean like Shin spicy. Spicy. Yep.
Molly 22:04
Well, pipeline. Is there anything else you would like to plug here on spilled milk today?
Pailin Chongchitnant 22:09
Aside from my book, my youtube channel view. If you want to watch Thai food being made rather than read about Thai food being made, you can go to my YouTube channel. It's pilings kitchen, or my website Hot Thai kitchen.com That's where all the recipes are
Molly 22:26
as well. Terrific.
Matthew Amster-Burton 22:27
Kailyn thanks so much for being on the show again.
Pailin Chongchitnant 22:29
Oh, you're welcome. This was fun
Matthew Amster-Burton 22:39
so I think we kind of covered it tie salad wise. Yeah, I
Molly 22:42
think so too. I think we should move on to spilled mail
Matthew Amster-Burton 22:52
All right, I've got two pieces of spilled mail here. We want to each read one Oh,
Molly 22:56
yeah. Okay, I'll begin here we have an update from listener Susan who referred to perfectly prepared eggs as P night or
Matthew Amster-Burton 23:06
we asked if you had a themed themed dinner nights Oh in the ugly prepared eggs. Yeah, they said they had P night which was like dishes starting with P
Molly 23:16
love this. Okay, Susan says thanks for the shout out on the show. I played it for the girls and they were impressed that they are now famous having been mentioned on a podcast Ah, my girls miss Hi girls. To answer the question. perfectly prepared eggs were usually scrambled and very soft. Addins might include pizza sauce or salsa, but usually they were playing. I love that.
Matthew Amster-Burton 23:40
I think salsa and eggs sound sounds great to me. And I've done that the idea of putting pizza sauce seems so wild.
Molly 23:47
I remember once I feel like I saw in some cookbook or something that like I could poach eggs in like marinara sauce or something and like eat it over garlic bread or whatever. But I just the sauce that I used was my regular tomato sauce which I like to be quite bright and it was weird. Like you couldn't even like taste the poached eggs. So I'm curious about putting tomato sauce or pizza sauce in eggs. I don't know how I don't know catch it.
Matthew Amster-Burton 24:17
I probably will try it I these are things I always have on hand.
Molly 24:20
Well excellent. Listener Susan. Oh, also I have to say that I really like that the eggs are scrambled soft. Yeah, me too like that a lot. All right. Thank you listener Susan.
Matthew Amster-Burton 24:31
Now listener Andrea writes listener since the beginning fried eggs. I was recently in Vietnam and a lot I can't believe someone's been listening to our show since episode one can us you listener Andrea. I was recently in Vietnam and a lots of amazing regional food. However, one evening we were in a craft beer pub and ordered pizza for a change. It was so piping hot that on my first bite I burned my lip on a hot piece of ham which because of the melted cheese adhered for a horrible moment before I shrieked and knocked it off. The hot ham injury looked like a cold sore and was pretty painful. The pizza was very good. I wonder if you've ever received an in Congress food related injury. Thank you for the joyful podcast and Happy New Year to you both Andrea.
Molly 25:13
Oh my god, Andrea. First of all my condolences. That sounds so painful. Oh my god, the ham adhering to your lip for a minute. Oh,
Matthew Amster-Burton 25:24
I mean, yeah, but okay. Molly, do you have do you have any food related injuries? Of note I have to?
Molly 25:29
I don't think I have any of note. But I will say I think I've said this on the show before but it bears restating which is that I find myself so disproportionately bummed out when I burn my tongue on something. Oh, yeah. Me to feel like well, there goes my life for two days. exact rate. Yeah, like now I'm not going to be able to enjoy
Matthew Amster-Burton 25:48
anything. Yeah, but that's yeah, that's more of a congruence food related injury, I think.
Molly 25:54
Okay, yeah. No, I've never like burned burned myself on hot ham pizza in Vietnam.
Matthew Amster-Burton 26:00
Yeah, no, I mean, one of mine. Like just I'm just matching because he had happened the other day. And because I'm an idiot, like, I decided that it would be a good idea to like pour even though I have like no depth perception to hold the mug in one in one hand and pour boiling water from the tea kettle. With the other hand, it just poured boiling water all over my hand. Oh, no. Luckily, it was a first degree burns so not too bad. It did peel off after a couple of days. It was very itchy and gross. So but I survived that.
Molly 26:28
Did you drop the cup?
Matthew Amster-Burton 26:30
I dropped everything. So the best part of the story is that why for the show Laurie does does phone tech support is her job. And she was on a call with a customer when in the background. I like poured boiling water on my head it's screed. Like through everything. And she and she said very calmly to the customer. We just have a small problem over here.
Molly 26:54
Oh my god, Watson.
Matthew Amster-Burton 26:58
Yeah, so anyway, it was it was fine. Now like I have a rule to myself that I will try keep which is put the bug down before pouring the water. But the one that I wanted to mention that listener listener Andrew made me think of which I'm sure I've told on the show before but not recently. Is that one too? When I was a kid, probably like 12 I was making popcorn in the air popper. Okay, remember, how about Yeah, I remember how everyone had an air popper in the 80s. So this was the 80s and I was popping popcorn in the air popper. And I couldn't find the little plastic butter dish that goes on the top. And I was like, Well, I don't want melted butter in my popcorn. Anyway, that's probably not important. So I'll just leave it off. And the problem is, but when popcorn gets hot, it tends to pop. So deadly hot unpopped kernels started flying out of the top of the of the air popper, and one of them landed between my bare toes.
Molly 27:59
I'm still trying to figure out like, where you just like standing around with your toes.
Matthew Amster-Burton 28:03
I was. I mean yeah, yes. As we all do, I was walking away from the air popper like to get a glass of water or something and like for your life, this evil Colonel like like I didn't even know there was going to be a problem yet this Colonel like, like, flew out halfway across the kitchen and landed between my toes. It hurts so much. And I got the most ridiculous like U shaped blister between my toes. It was it was I'm glad it I'm glad I could laugh about it now because it didn't seem funny at the time.
Molly 28:33
When you told this story on a different episode. I'm trying to remember five other episodes. I'm trying to remember if I told the story about the time I stepped on a dead shriveled caterpillar in our kitchen, in your house, myself has a lot of empathy for living things. And you did. Well, but so ash in June was like this was like three or three years ago, maybe ash in June, we're like doing something outside in the springtime. And they found a caterpillar and they decided that like he needed to be brought inside boy for like monitoring or something. And so they put him in like,
Matthew Amster-Burton 29:12
they put like a little ball spot.
Molly 29:16
They decided what he needed was human intervention. Sure, of course. And so they put him in an aluminum mixing bowl with some like dirt and some leaves and stuff like that. And then like a couple of days later, he went missing. Sure. And we all just figured he was like buried under the soil or something. But I was in the kitchen early one morning Oh boy and stepped and felt something and I mentioned this because it was between my toes like I didn't squish him like he literally went in like the crevice between my toes and where my toes attached. He was already expired at that point expired and he had the consistency of like shriveling water balloon. Oh god I screamed so loud Oh yeah. And then I was angry too. So once I was done with my regular like Scream surprise, then I threw in like a scream of anger with my arms like, like straight at my side. I was like, what were you thinking? Like, God? Anyway, we still talk about my like my added like angry scream. Sure,
Matthew Amster-Burton 30:23
yeah, recently like, literally yesterday, I had like a minor moral quandary because why for the show Laurie said, you know, I feel bad for our apartment manager because she has been on vacation and when she gets back, she's going to have to deal with the fact that there is a huge dead rat in the middle of the parking garage. And I for just a second I was like, I could be like the local hero who deals with this dead rat problem before the manager gets back. And then I was like, Well, I don't want to do that. And I'm not gonna get credit for it because no one will know I did it. Oh,
Molly 30:58
oh my God. Matthew, we I think one morning in the last year I got a text from my mom like early first thing. I don't know what my mom had been out doing. But she lives a block from us and she had driven past our house and she saw something on the ground by the mailbox. And she came closer and it was a dead cat. I'm so sorry. I know you're a cat man.
Matthew Amster-Burton 31:20
I'm a captain. Yes,
Molly 31:22
it was a dead cat just like lying peacefully next to the mailbox.
Matthew Amster-Burton 31:26
Abby can we put a content warning at the top of this episode? Please? Seriously?
Molly 31:30
Anyway, my mom was like, I don't want June to like accidentally see it when you leave the house to take them to school. Anyway, so we had to go out and move the cat.
Matthew Amster-Burton 31:43
Okay, fine. You guilted me into it. I'm gonna deal with this fucking dead rats. Yeah, deal with the dead rat man. I can't let you be be such you already know you're a better person than me. But like just like maybe like one or two levels. You can't like you'd be like three levels better than me.
Molly 31:58
Okay, okay, great. All right. Well, there we go. I cleared up your moral quandary. Thanks. I'm Matthew Do you have a now but wow,
Matthew Amster-Burton 32:05
I do.
It is from friend of the show. Florentina Liao, aka listener, Florrie who has her first book is out now. It's called How Kyoto breaks your heart. And it's a memoir slash essay collection of like beautiful essays about life in Japan and friendship. It's like, you know, a lot of the book is about breaking up with a friend, which you know, there are millions of books about romantic breakups, but very few books about friend breakups, which which can be even more devastating. And like, you know, this book like, treats that like in a really like, really real way, but it's also it's about food. It's about person, persimmon tree. It's about leading guided tours in Japan, and about the joy of mediocre coffee and comforting surroundings. And so that's how Kyoto breaks your heart by Florentina Liao. And the best way to order it is from Book Depository, which has because it's from a small publisher in the UK, but it's free shipping worldwide. I highly recommend this book. We'll link to it in the show
Molly 33:14
notes. Oh, congratulations listener, Florrie.
Matthew Amster-Burton 33:16
Yeah. And I guess what like by the time you hear this episode, episode, I she mentioned to me like I'm having a book event in Megiddo. Tokyo just in case you're gonna be in the neighborhood. We're gonna be in the neighborhood.
Molly 33:29
Incredible. Yeah, Matthew, by the time you hear this episode, Matthew will be in Tokyo for the first time since the pandemic began. Yeah, that's true. I am not jealous at all. That's right. I am extremely jealous. Yeah,
Matthew Amster-Burton 33:42
I mean, you'll you'll just have to like get the good feeling of being a better person than me I guess.
Molly 33:47
Okay, good. that'll last a little longer than a trip to Tokyo anyway. Exactly. All right. Well, our producer is Abby sir Catella who pretty much every time she edits an episode from us gets that good feeling of being a better person than
Matthew Amster-Burton 34:02
that's Molly has a newsletter is your newsletter back
Molly 34:06
my newsletter is back it was on hiatus for parental leave and I have to say in all honesty that I wish I'd given myself a little more time sure. But it's back now you can you can make your baby right it now I can make my baby right it although I have to say that. Did you ever watch The when Timothy shallow May was on Saturday Night Live that he did a skit called tiny horse.
Matthew Amster-Burton 34:30
I think Did you watch this? And I did. Yes. Okay. Well,
Molly 34:33
our baby is an extremely noisy baby and oh yeah, so many sounds that sound like a tiny horse winning Yeah, I
Matthew Amster-Burton 34:41
met this baby a couple times and he makes the best baby noises
Molly 34:45
Wait to transcribe his tiny horse sounds and and use them as a newsletter entreat? No, but for real. I I work hard on my newsletter, and you can find it at Molly weisenberg.substack.com And it's called I've got a feeling It's back.
Matthew Amster-Burton 35:00
Yep, my the single from my band early to the airport cornerstones is out now on all the streaming platforms. I think we already like forced you to listen to it by putting it in a previous episode. I am just hearing now that the I think the whole EP six songs will be out in March, which is sooner than I expected. And it probably won't be available by the time you hear this, but soon and I'll bug you about it again. I'm really proud of how it came out.
Molly 35:28
Oh my gosh, please bug us all. And don't worry listeners we will let you know as soon as the whole EP is available. Yes, you can rate and review us wherever you get your podcasts
Matthew Amster-Burton 35:38
and you can hang out with other people who listen at everything spilled milk.reddit.com It's just a positive community of people who listen to spilled milk and eat foods.
Molly 35:48
Thank you for listening to spilled milk where we're sad for your hot ham burns.
Matthew Amster-Burton 35:54
Where you say we're sad for your hot hand.
Molly 35:57
We're a salve a salvo.
Matthew Amster-Burton 36:00
Oh, a sap. How do you say that word?
Molly 36:02
I don't know. I always try to say it really fast before nobody notices. I
Matthew Amster-Burton 36:06
thought it's a style but and then when it came out of my mouth. Yeah,
Molly 36:11
we're a salve for all the hot ham burns your ears might ever receive.
Matthew Amster-Burton 36:17
Yeah, if you've been if you've been putting hot ham in your ears. You're you're one of our listeners.
Molly 36:24
I'm Molly Weissenberg. And I'm Amster-Burton.
So welcome to Thai salads to where we are telling you all our secrets about serums and lip plumping.
Matthew Amster-Burton 36:40
Oh wow. Do you do you do something for lip plumping?
Molly 36:44
No. I mean, have you seen these lips? I have my grandfather Eli's lips and I can barely enunciate around them. They're so big, because they're so plump naturally plump. Yeah, they're like a bit of a liability.
Matthew Amster-Burton 36:55
That is like the definition of a humble brag, right? They're like,
Molly 37:00
yeah, look at pictures of my grandfather Eli. Like it was not a humble brag for him. That dude's lips were like falling off his face. It looked a little weird. So anyway, no, I don't do any lip plumping. What about you, Matthew? I know it's a little bit
Matthew Amster-Burton 37:15
of don't do any lip plumping. I recently did what I call the Kea. 95 compliant beard. Oh, usually usually I've got like a full beard, but I went back to like VanDyke so I could fit a mask over it for traveling. And I think it looks really dumb.
Molly 37:32
How much of this do you think Abby is going to allow in the actual episode? I
Matthew Amster-Burton 37:37
should probably get edited down to like 110 Second outtake Oh, perfect. Okay, great. Oh, just you talking about like lips falling off your your grandfather's face. That's right. Yeah, grandfather, grandfather.