Today we present Hot Topics and the wrong content warnings as we discuss these finger hats. Matthew quizzes Molly as we put multiple things on blast all before receiving a long awaited update. This episode is sponsored by FlimFlam.
The blurriest video on YouTube
Episode 50: Toothpaste and Shampoo
Molly's Now but Wow! - “Fishing in the Blood,” a new poem by Donika Kelly
Listen to our spinoff show Dire Desires
Join our reddit
Molly 0:00
Hi. I'm Molly. And I'm Matthew and this is spilled milk. The show where we cook something delicious. Eat it all and you can't have any
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:10
and today we're talking about extruded corn snacks.
Molly 0:14
Wow, this is the hottest topic we've ever done. I don't think I've ever heard a sexier word than extruded.
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:21
Oh, like a hot like a sexy topic. Not hot like hot topics.
Molly 0:25
No, no, like, sexy topic.
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:27
It's like not like hot topic. Like we're gonna go get like a belt with a bunch of studs on it.
Molly 0:31
I was thinking of the laticrete Spin shirt.
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:33
So yeah, so So I'm wearing I'm wearing my studded belt. Molly's wearing some Doc Martens, which I asked her to take off before coming into my house but no, no this this episode was suggested by host Matthew.
Molly 0:47
Thank you host Matthew okay, what we're talking about here to be clear is we're talking about those like chip alternative snacks that are made from fried or baked but like not puffed corn batter. Can you say more about this?
Matthew Amster-Burton 1:00
Yeah, so this this episode is a it's a Trojan horse because really like I've gotten really into turtle chips lately and I just wanted to have an excuse to eat a ton of turtle chips on the show. Oh, by the way, like, like content warning for this show. This is going to be one of the crunchiest episodes ever but we'll try and confine it to a tasting segment near the end so
Molly 1:19
if you're triggered by crunching sounds yes sitter this an episode you should skip
Matthew Amster-Burton 1:25
right so like a puffed corn snack would be like a like a Cheeto and we've done that okay, yeah, this these are like bugles and things like bugles that are made of like a like a rolled out corn batter that's fried. Funyuns Funyuns Yeah, I think so. I think so. I mean, they are kind of puffy, but like when I when I was like, did I even know that Funyuns were made from corn before you put it on here. No, I had to look it up.
Molly 1:48
I didn't realize that either. But I did look it up to see if they were extruded.
Matthew Amster-Burton 1:52
Yeah, totally. So then so here's the other thing, the other embarrassing admission. I'm not actually sure if the things we're talking about are extruded. Perfect. Okay. Okay. So extruded is when like a batter is forced out through like a slit or like a like a tie.
Molly 2:10
Yeah, I mean, I think that probably a lot of us are familiar with this idea in terms of pasta shapes,
Matthew Amster-Burton 2:15
right so I suppose Yeti is an extruded pasta. It's a pen, right? But these guys like are made from and I'm going to use this word a lot on this episode, basically a long strand of corn popper deli so like a wide pasta noodle and they're extruded into a fryer. Well the thing I'm not sure about is like I watched a bunch of videos will get I watched some weird ass videos that I don't know whether that popper deli is great created by rolling or extrusion.
Molly 2:45
Wait a minute, I want to be clear here because we've been talking about extruded pastas and now you're talking about corn snacks, but you're using the word papardelle A which refers to pasta
Matthew Amster-Burton 2:54
so hold on when you say mission in life is clarity so
Molly 2:57
when you say corn papardelle A You mean like the dough that is used to make these extruded corn snacks
Matthew Amster-Burton 3:05
well I mean the dough and then the dough is either rolled or extruded out into like a flat like tapeworm kind of shape and then you eat enough of them you might get a tapeworm
Molly 3:16
How do you get a tapeworm you ingest it?
Matthew Amster-Burton 3:18
Well you definitely ingest food Yeah, like like maybe like a like a lar larva or like a spore Have You Ever Have you know, of you know, like, when when I was a kid my dad had like a joke a tapeworm joke that he loved to tell but
Molly 3:35
what about the like worms that like come out through your skin? Those aren't tapeworms are they are do you poop out tapeworms?
Matthew Amster-Burton 3:41
I mean if you're lucky
Molly 3:44
to tell but there are other kinds of worms that you can get that come out.
Matthew Amster-Burton 3:47
I can't believe we gave a content warning for crunching sounds and then immediately you start talking about worms coming out of your skin
Molly 3:55
sorry sorry. Oh, okay. Like crosses the skin barrier. Yes. Like we need it. How
Matthew Amster-Burton 4:04
do you get those things? I don't know never go at you like like going outside which I'm now never gonna do
Molly 4:11
here I was hoping you could go camping with me again this summer. No, apparently there's like parasites galore. We all have them in us anyway, but not those kinds of parasites. So
Matthew Amster-Burton 4:21
I was I was at the checkout at the QFC yesterday buying some bugles for this episode. And I got like a important message on your receipt like don't forget to read this important message and so I looked at the receipt and it said that I bought gold metal flour and it had been recalled for possible salmonella and it said this this may cause a reaction in people have sensitive or allergic to salmonella and I'm like that is not how that works.
Molly 4:48
What do you think that was just like a little template that they slotted the word salmonella into it's like that's not but like
Matthew Amster-Burton 4:55
what would they do like sometimes like you know product gets like broken glass in it when they say that like People, people who are sensitive to broken glass and injustice product. Yeah,
Molly 5:03
if you're allergic to broken glass, please return your gold medal flour.
Matthew Amster-Burton 5:07
Okay, so great. So everyone ever gets turned off by doubt, except for the people who are so into crunching sounds that they have to hang on to it get to that part. Welcome. All right, so yes, Funyuns count and it says it says here, I noticed that you got Funyuns in the middle school vending machines.
Molly 5:26
So So I went to a private school growing up in Oklahoma. Oh,
Matthew Amster-Burton 5:30
yeah. No, at public school. We didn't have vending machines.
Molly 5:33
No, but what was weird about this place is so it was Montessori based. So they're willing a lot of kind of freedoms that we had made of wood. Well, there were a lot of like freedoms that we thought was really good.
Matthew Amster-Burton 5:47
Is that Waldorf school.
Molly 5:50
There's a lot of stuff like in early learning and Montessori, the pink tower, the binomial cube trinomial cube,
Matthew Amster-Burton 5:59
did you have Morning Wood clap?
Molly 6:02
Back to you. Okay, I did make a cutting board in first grade.
Matthew Amster-Burton 6:08
Awesome. Yeah. And is it still in use?
Molly 6:10
Yes, my mom still has it. Yeah. Okay. But what I'm trying to say here is that I remember, like really being excited in middle school about these kinds of like, weird freedoms that we had, like, we could eat in class, okay. And we also didn't have to sit in our chairs if we didn't want to. So I could like sit on the floor or you No, like being being a middle schooler. There was a period of time when I went through a period of like, sitting on the floor under the table just because I could, yeah, like, these are the kinds of freedoms we need to give children take your socks off in class. Yeah, like just the ability to do things that don't actually cause any consequences, but make kids feel like they have agency.
Matthew Amster-Burton 6:51
Absolutely. So yeah, I couldn't agree more. Yeah,
Molly 6:54
I remember that. more days than not, I would go to the vending machine that was over by the locker rooms, there was a single like Coke machine and a single like, snack vending machine. The line would be so low. Sure. And of course, there were always certain things that were like the hot commodity. So I would have never chosen Funyuns except that Funyuns or the cool thing to get
Matthew Amster-Burton 7:18
finance were a cool thing when I was in school at 1.2.
Molly 7:21
Yeah, yeah. So of course when it was my turn up at the vending machine, I got Funyuns and then I would step and one step to the left and get a barks root beer out of the sounds great. And then I would sit under the table in Mrs. Oldham's English class and eat my Funyuns and drink my root beer.
Matthew Amster-Burton 7:38
Could anyone hear what Mrs. Oldham's was saying over all of the fun Yeah, and crunchy.
Molly 7:43
I mean, not to mention like the foil Yeah, packaging. I anyway, their root beer burps Yeah, yeah. Were you allowed to eat stuff like this in class in middle school? Oh, okay.
Matthew Amster-Burton 7:54
Even though like I also went to like a hippie ish Middle School. Okay. Wow. Yeah, so yeah, I my memory lane is I have like occasionally snacked on bugles and I think of them as like a thing you get at a gas station. And I don't know if I've ever had bugles I don't think I've ever bought them at the store before like not at a gas station. I don't think I've ever had them. Okay. I don't think they're very good but we're gonna find out okay.
Molly 8:21
And you noted here that you have sometimes stuck them on the the ends of your fingertips like amay li the movie character does with raspberries yes
Matthew Amster-Burton 8:29
okay I want to talk about this because bugles I want to I want to talk about a couple different things on the bugles bag. First of all, it says they are America's number one finger hat. And when I when I mentioned this to wait for the show, Laurie, she said, What about olives?
Molly 8:42
Oh god, she's onto something there. I think beagles is totally pulling our
Matthew Amster-Burton 8:47
lesson. We should like get them to to like testify before God.
Molly 8:51
I think we should put them on blast. That's what we do. Yeah, we don't cancel people. We don't you know, we don't. We don't call them before a grand jury. We put them on blast.
Matthew Amster-Burton 9:01
We dunk on them. We should put them on our fingers and blast. Oh, grab a finger blast. Okay, John, the back end says who should eat bugles anyone? And I want to call your attention to the fact that I fit into a couple of the categories of
Molly 9:21
electric. They list categories categories. I want you
Matthew Amster-Burton 9:25
to see if you can guess which of these I fall into. hockey moms and referees. Father and son curling teams. Book clovers. Yes, that's you. Yeah, I've been in a book and actually I just signed up to to attend a Mystery Book Club. Which I love it. So am I excited about landlubbers? I think that's even party sound dubbers
Molly 9:51
that's definitely you.
Matthew Amster-Burton 9:52
What is that bandleaders?
Molly 9:57
Yeah, that's you. Hey, everybody. Did you know man Matthew has an EP out with his band or way to the next one sorry
Matthew Amster-Burton 10:04
lead singers. Oh, that's lion tamers that's me. Yes. All night gamers. If if like feeding feeding or trying to get a baby back to sleep is a game. Oh,
Molly 10:16
I'm really good at it right now.
Matthew Amster-Burton 10:18
Nine out of 10 doctors, nine out of 10 Doctors that's on the bugles bag. Yes they don't recommend bugles they just should eat bugles. Oh okay, it doesn't even say they do but they should
Molly 10:29
Okay, should they take their gloves off before they put on their finger hats or put your gloves over your finger hats they should
Matthew Amster-Burton 10:35
know when they're like scrubbing in for surgery. They should put on their gloves and then each finger and then tagged to perform surgery.
Molly 10:44
Extreme surgery Yeah,
Matthew Amster-Burton 10:46
I want to I want to go ahead and eat a couple of bugles before we start talking about them because otherwise
Molly 10:51
I didn't realize that there was like a bugles original flavor. This looks like cereal. This looks like look like cereal. I definitely can't fit this over my hand.
Matthew Amster-Burton 11:00
How are my finger opening is too small Yeah, how
Molly 11:02
skinny are your fingers man? Are they flat? Do you have tapeworm years All right,
Matthew Amster-Burton 11:10
here's your kind of better than I remembered.
Molly 11:12
This kind of tastes like a funny shaped Frito but a little less a little lighter.
Matthew Amster-Burton 11:16
Yeah. No, it does. It tastes like a funny shape Fredo. Oh, I love this. Okay. No, this is like, Okay, so here's what happened to me lately. This is this is why I was putting bugles on blast. Partly because they lied about being America's number one finger hat and I can't stand lies. But also, I was at a gas station recently. I was gonna get some some checks, buddy buddies. And then I saw they were they had chocolate caramel bugles. And I was like, Oh, this has got to be good. And they sucked.
Molly 11:46
No, I would never think that was good. original flavor bugles. Pretty good. Ooh, chocolate caramel bugles. You thought that would be good. Oh, oh, man. I can't believe we're friends and you make these kinds of bad decisions. And
Matthew Amster-Burton 12:00
oh, I was at the gas station. Like it's like the land of bad decisions.
Molly 12:04
Did you know that I once had somebody tell me that they couldn't be friends with me because I had a one night stand and didn't adequately protect myself. And they told me after the fact that they couldn't be friends with someone who took risks like
Matthew Amster-Burton 12:18
that. Wow. Like that is really harsh. That's yeah, that I mean,
Molly 12:23
I was just a dumb 23 year old I was stupid.
Matthew Amster-Burton 12:26
Yeah, like, like list listeners. Like I've done stupid stuff. Can we still be friends? Yeah, I mean, you can't be friends with someone who's done stupid stuff. You're gonna have any friends? Like, I was gonna say you have to just get a dog but dogs do nothing busted.
Molly 12:40
Oh my god, I cannot stop doing stupid stuff. Right?
Matthew Amster-Burton 12:43
So I don't know. Like, what animal doesn't do stupid stuff. Where my guest
Molly 12:50
probably cats. They'd be really insulted if you told them they were doing stupid stuff.
Matthew Amster-Burton 12:53
Cats always like have a look like they're being smart, but they're also very stupid. So okay, all right. So let's get into the history of bugles. Bugles were developed by a food scientist named Vern Weiss of Plymouth Minnesota. You ever been to Plymouth Minnesota? I have not mean you there. They were introduced to the market by General Mills. So now this is from Wikipedia. Bugles were test marketed in 1965 and introduced nationally in early 1966 as one of several new General Mills snacks, including flower shaped daisies wheel shaped pizza spins, tube shape whistles, cheddar cheese flavored buttons and bow shaped popcorn flavored bows, all of which were discontinued in the 1970s. Oh, this is disappointing since then, I feel like bugles have had kind of a hard time of it. So back to Wikipedia bugles were discontinued in Canada in early 2010 due to a decrease in demand but brought back in November 2011. Due to renewed consumer demand. Do you think
Molly 13:50
that people like stood outside of grocery stores and like had customers like sign petition? Like do you want to employ Yeah, do you want to bring bugles back like sign this petition?
Matthew Amster-Burton 14:00
Yeah, BBB bring bugles back?
Molly 14:04
Yeah, make Canada filled with bugles again,
Matthew Amster-Burton 14:07
and I have an update on the situation. On November 14 2022, the official bugles Twitter account confirmed that their products are no longer available in Canada. Wow. So yeah, I want to know like so I think probably like factually you are correct that like some bugles fans got mad and petitioned to have them come back, but the way it's written makes it sound like demand for bugles dropped so much that they discontinued them. And then for some reason, demand came roaring back. What do you think happened?
Molly 14:38
I mean, maybe there was a maybe like, a celebrity or beloved public figure, let's say Justin Bieber, oh, maybe Justin Bieber was spotted with a bag of bugles. Yeah,
Matthew Amster-Burton 14:51
that that he purchased before they were discontinued or maybe got from America when he was one of his world tour.
Molly 14:57
Maybe Corey Hart Yes,
Matthew Amster-Burton 14:58
Canada's two biggest celeb already Yeah,
Molly 15:00
Corey Hart was seen eating bugles while wearing his sunglasses at night.
Matthew Amster-Burton 15:05
Maybe Maybe Jann Arden, maybe. Maybe Tom Cochran,
Molly 15:09
Ruth Rendell? Yes. Did I pronounce that right? I
Matthew Amster-Burton 15:14
think so. I think so. Yeah. Margaret Atwood Oh, well what we've seen just snarfing bugles.
Molly 15:24
She had them on her fingers like
Matthew Amster-Burton 15:27
Yeah, I think Margaret outward but I think I think just like a fun purse.
Molly 15:33
Oh my friend Kate Kate shots. She interviewed Margaret Atwood for some sort of event at like University of Santa Cruz like department of the humanities or something. And it was on Zoom during the pandemic and apparently Margaret Atwood spent like the whole first few minutes like absolutely fawning over Kate's tattoos. Oh, that's so nice. say great. I love that. I love it. When
Matthew Amster-Burton 15:57
when mean to put Margaret Atwood on blast.
Molly 15:59
No you didn't you didn't put her on blast. I mean, I I bet she loves bugles. Yeah, I bet she does. If you know Margaret Atwood, everybody, let us know Does she love bugles or if you are Margaret Atwood and you're listening to this we're big fans.
Matthew Amster-Burton 16:12
Yeah, no, I think she she's like a listener back like episode one. I've no evidence that this isn't true. Okay. In Japan bugles are called tone gaudy corn, which means pointy corn. In Sweden in Norway. They are known as sombreros, which doesn't make any sense. No. In Israel, they're known as apropos. Which I love. In Italy. They're called vidual virtual. Why don't know but the bag is awesome.
Molly 16:45
Oh my gosh, we've got a link to this. We'll
Matthew Amster-Burton 16:47
surely do this. It is every bit as stylish as you imagine. Well, I
Molly 16:51
can't figure out what the shape is that is depicted on this bag though.
Matthew Amster-Burton 16:55
That is a good point. I mean, it's the same it's the same snack
Molly 16:59
okay, but it kind of looks like a finger like like a pointer finger and a thumb sort of reached out to grab like
Matthew Amster-Burton 17:06
the pincer grip it looks like like a baby learning the pincer grip. But yeah, it's the snack that grips you. Virtually virtually grips here. Alright, would you like to know how bugles are made please? Okay, so I watched the blurriness video on YouTube, which we'll link to in the show notes. There I stumbled on to like a genre of YouTube video that I didn't know about which is like, demonstrations of industrial like factory equipment. Was not specific. Like this wasn't like, you know, Mark summers, like you know, our pupils are bugles made like I'm a fun guy and I'm gonna take you into this fun bugle factory and everyone's gonna stick them on our fingers.
Molly 17:44
Was that a double dare guy?
Matthew Amster-Burton 17:45
It was the Double Dare guy but then he did he did a series for Food Network I think or maybe Nickelodeon also about like, how shit is made?
Molly 17:54
Oh, I've heard of that podcast. Yeah, right. Yeah. Sorry, Abby. What? Why no happy loves that podcast. How Did This Get Made?
Matthew Amster-Burton 18:04
Oh, I love that podcast too. Yeah, I call it I call it a podcast. I don't know why I pronounced it that way. Okay, but this is this is like Okay, so maybe I want to open a factory and maybe I want a big bugles in it. What I want to find out like Who should I Who should I order my beautiful manufacturing equipment from? Maybe maybe the people who made this video so strips of corn paste or like like which it's like fresh pasta but made from like corn flour and salt and sugar and probably some kind of preservative okay. Get either rolled or extruded out this part wasn't in the video into like really long, like popper deli shaped noodles and they are fed into a folding and cutting machine that turns them into cones.
Molly 18:49
Ah, okay. And are they wrapped around like a tiny little conical thing like a one? Oh,
Matthew Amster-Burton 18:55
I don't think so. I think they're just folded over and cut.
Molly 18:59
This explains why they
Matthew Amster-Burton 19:02
come out pretty flat. Yeah. Then they go through a conveyor belt oven or so I thought and then if they're gonna get flavored, they get tossed in a drum with flavor powder. But then I watched a different blurry video in which it looked like they were getting fried in a kettle and I was like, what's going on? Then? I figured it out because the ones in the first one we're going through a continuous frying production line. What does that mean? So it's like they go through they go through on a conveyor belt that where they get like drizzled with hot oil okay and so it's like can like they can like continuously fry Wow, instead of having to like go into a kettle and then somehow fish them out
Molly 19:42
is the conveyor belt like porous?
Matthew Amster-Burton 19:43
So the oil I think so. Yes. comes out the other side. Otherwise he would be like a lot of sluice into juice.
Molly 19:51
Well, I mean, I'm kind of picturing it like the like the way that they make donuts at Krispy
Matthew Amster-Burton 19:56
Kreme. Yeah, or like how they toast sandwiches at Quiznos. Exactly right? Yes, yes. All right. So if you want to if you want to get a like start a bugle factory, like I will send you to the video that's going to point you in the right direction. Okay, but don't start a Google factory because there's a new thing and extruded corn snacks which may or may not be extruded. It's turtle chips.
Molly 20:17
Okay, now, I first heard of these from my child, June, right who went to Asian family market upon Aurora with our friends, the Burmeister is June and their friend Elizabeth tried maybe chocolate turtle chips, and came home raving about it, but I've still never had them.
Matthew Amster-Burton 20:36
Okay, so I think we need to start so I got five flavors of turtle. Okay, so
Molly 20:39
what are turtle chips? They're
Matthew Amster-Burton 20:41
not made of turtles. They're not made of turtles. No, no common misconception. They are they are so called because the shape is said to resemble a turtle shell it does not. But okay, they are made by Orion confectionary, a South Korean snack brand. And I first noticed them at m two m but I didn't buy them for a long time just because I'm dumb. And then one day they went on sale there was a big pile of the seaweed flavor for $3 by the cash register and I'm like, Okay, I will give these a try. And I ate most of the bag on the way home and it is a large bag. I love this. And like for me, the seaweed Turtle Ship is like the definition of a perfectly engineered food product.
Molly 21:19
Okay, bring it up. Put it on the table. We're going to take let's just go seaweed first. Okay, let's go seaweed first. Oh, there's a really cute turtle on the on the bag. He looks like does he have like, like snorkel goggles on?
Matthew Amster-Burton 21:33
He does have snorkel snorkel. Yeah, I guess like to swim through hot oil. Okay, first of all, do these look like turtle shells?
Molly 21:44
Absolutely not. Oh, okay. I mean, you describe this? Lighter than a bugle. Less corn flavor. less salty. Yep. A little sweet. A little sweet. And then it's like got this, you know, powder. It looks like maybe pulverized seaweed. That gives it a tiny bit of ocean flavor.
Matthew Amster-Burton 22:08
Yep. So I kind of thought maybe like turtle chips must be quite different from bugles in terms of production. They're not. Oh, so here's I'm gonna do my best to describe this on the show. And it's gonna be kind of like when Molly tried to describe a raclette maker. Don't eat too many of these because we have four other flavors to try.
Molly 22:29
Oh, no.
Matthew Amster-Burton 22:31
I was having so much fun. Oh, they're so good. Right? Okay. So if you can picture this instead of a single layer of corn popper deli passing through the machine, there are four layers that are like vertically stacked but running through about an inch apart. I see them parallel and then they get they like take a turn downwards and meet up. So they are being cut and pressed together into a four layer stack. That's approximately square. They get like pressed with like striations like a bugle. But so it's like it's like a four layer bugle instead of a two layer bugle.
Molly 23:09
I wonder who decided that this was going to be the shape and why they decided that these looks like turtles. I know
Matthew Amster-Burton 23:18
but it's a good name. Okay,
Molly 23:20
Turtle chips. And are these new?
Matthew Amster-Burton 23:27
They they were introduced in 2017. So yes. Okay. Now what's this flavor? This is sweet corn flavor, which I have not tried before because I always go for like a font. Oh, well. This is really sweet. There's a kettle corn. Oh, yeah. Okay, so these are very sweet. These tastes kind of like Corn Pops. Not that not the text.
Molly 23:44
I don't love the aftertaste of this. I mean, it's fine. But
Matthew Amster-Burton 23:49
now it also kind of implies that these are corn soup flavored.
Molly 23:53
You know? I get that.
Matthew Amster-Burton 23:56
Yeah, so I thought I thought these were going to be more like like a plain bugles. They're not they're very sweet. Not my favorite. They're not my favorite either. But they're not terrible. Look, the turtle on the bags is crying with happiness. Yes. And also it says turtle chips news. So what is what is the latest news from the world of turtle chips?
Molly 24:15
I hang on. Okay, so yeah, sweet corn flavored blah blah, blah. harmonizes and blends in the flavor of sweet corn. I mean, I I don't hate it.
Matthew Amster-Burton 24:23
No, no, I actually don't hate it. Oh, is this a spicy one? Yeah, so this is flaming lime.
Molly 24:28
Okay, I'm ready. Have you had these? Yes. Okay,
Matthew Amster-Burton 24:31
this is this is why for the show Lori's favorite flavors so far. There are a few that I read about but have not found yet like which like flaming Mala. Shrimp and Mexico barbecue
Molly 24:44
I'm sure all those are good. What is flaming Mala?
Matthew Amster-Burton 24:48
Mala is like the C 20s flavor of chili and Sichuan peppercorn so hot and numbing. Okay. Yeah, like the flame in line.
Molly 24:56
I'm really torn. Jun has recently observed that many of their favorite snacks have this warning on there. The California proposition 65 warning. Sure this product can expose you to chemicals including acrylamide, which is known to the state of Washington in the state of California to cause cancer. I am skeptical. How am I supposed to feel about this?
Matthew Amster-Burton 25:18
I'm very skeptical of it. Okay.
Molly 25:21
I think that's quite good. Yep.
Matthew Amster-Burton 25:31
All right, so are you ready for dessert? Over I forgot to mention that the reason I know how they make turtle chips is that I watched a blurry YouTube video.
Molly 25:38
Oh, this is a theme. Yeah. Okay. So yeah, I'm ready for dessert. I mean, the the sweet corn one kind of already deserved already dessert. Okay, these are the ones June raved about. Oh, no, these are churros. Choco churros. Oh, whoa, but isn't there just like a plain chocolate?
Matthew Amster-Burton 25:56
Not that I've seen okay. Really good. Right? Whoa,
Molly 26:01
this is so much better than I thought they would be made you it's really cocoa II
Matthew Amster-Burton 26:05
it's really cocoa a there's a little bit of cinnamon. They're not super sweet. And they kind of taste like a churro and there's
Molly 26:11
something about the texture of the dough or the the texture of the chip. That works really well with this sweet chocolatey cinnamon flavor. Yeah, like a bugle that was tasting like this is going to be too crunchy and too
Matthew Amster-Burton 26:28
but what if it was a chocolate caramel? Our I was out and about I said
Molly 26:34
Wow. Okay.
Matthew Amster-Burton 26:36
Okay. All right. We've got one more I haven't tried this one yet. One more. Oh, okay. I'm very excited about it even though we're going off script. So here's here's what's going on with okay. This last one is made with wheat rather than corn. Have you heard of this grain?
Molly 26:51
Ah, say more. Okay,
Matthew Amster-Burton 26:54
so wheat. It derives from a from a wild grain called triticale daily.
Molly 27:01
Oh, is there a part of it called the chaff? There is a
Matthew Amster-Burton 27:05
part called the chaff that's my favorite part. Oh, okay. Loved you just chopped some chat. I'm a total chap.
Molly 27:14
Yeah, I'm I'm a functional chapur. Today,
Matthew Amster-Burton 27:21
I'm chuffed that your chat. Oh, nice. These ones that I'm having trouble opening are nutty in Jomi flavor and Jomi is like the Korean equivalent of like a mochi snack. So it's like a chewy snack that's dusted with offense soybean powder or some other kind of powder. These are like the like raw, like animal strength that I've that I use to open that bag. Yeah. And so these ones are made with a wheat batter rather than corn and then dusted with quinoa co like soybean powder and peanut powder. I think. So. I'm pretty excited. Okay. Yeah, I like it.
Molly 27:57
The peanut flavor is quite subtle. But I do feel like I'm getting that like toasted rice flavor. Mm hmm.
Matthew Amster-Burton 28:05
These ones are very sweet.
Molly 28:07
These are extremely sweet. But I mean, that's, it's a very good product. Yeah, as
Matthew Amster-Burton 28:11
far as the dessert goes, Yeah, I'm in. Okay. Okay, I
Molly 28:15
know where to even begin here.
Matthew Amster-Burton 28:17
Oh, are we gonna rank these? I'm just trying to decide which ones I would actually buy. Are we going to cheese plate? Yeah, that's that's a good question. So the seaweed is still my favorite.
Molly 28:25
I think the seaweed is is a truly perfect product. Then again, I also think bugles are pretty great.
Matthew Amster-Burton 28:32
Bugles are much better than I expect. Yeah.
Molly 28:35
The sweet corn near the flaming lime. I don't love chips with lime flavor.
Matthew Amster-Burton 28:41
I don't usually either for some reason this one works better for me than most like if there's a new like, you know, Lay's, like habanero lime. I'm going to skip it because I don't like that lime powder flavor. But here I don't mind it for some reason. Okay.
Molly 28:53
And then I think I prefer the chocolate churro over the I'm sorry, what was the word for these guys and nobody enjoy me. Okay, the nutty enjoy me flavor. Yeah, I prefer the chocolate churros. Can I have a couple more? Yes. Okay. Wow, Matthew.
Matthew Amster-Burton 29:07
Which ones you're going to take home? That's the question.
Molly 29:10
Oh my god. There's chocolate churro ones. off the hook. Yeah. Wow. And I'm not somebody who really likes the flavor of chocolate and cinnamon together. Yeah, not my
Matthew Amster-Burton 29:20
point. Usually mean either. Like when there's like churros that you can like dip in like hot chocolate usually. Just like skip the dip.
Molly 29:27
Oh, I would dip. But I don't really like you know, like a truffle that's got like cinnamon in it or I just like Mexican hot chocolate. Yeah, my thing.
Matthew Amster-Burton 29:38
So there is one there was one flavor at the store that I did not get which was the truffle salt flavor because I've just never liked truffle flavored anything. Okay, but I think I could probably I could probably get down on that. Yeah,
Molly 29:49
I think I do it. Wow, this was delightful. I
Matthew Amster-Burton 29:52
feel I feel like you know, something in my brain has been extruded.
Molly 29:56
Where can our listeners find turtle chips? In the city of Seattle,
Matthew Amster-Burton 30:01
I have a feeling they're going to break out and become more available in non Asian grocery stores. But for now like in Seattle, they can get a bit M to M I'm sure they have MedWatch Amaya like Asian family market clearly that was what schoon had them say I mean they're from they're from Korea, like any any store that carries some Korean ingredients and snacks will probably have them okay. Delicious but yeah, but these these are going to explode right? Oh, like time wake time once the kids like get get their their hands into this flame in line bags.
Molly 30:34
Mm hmm.
Matthew Amster-Burton 30:35
Like kids don't do drugs. Take your hands out of those dime bags and put them into flavor. One.
Molly 30:39
Nice one. Well, yeah. Okay. Matthew, do we have a segment or two?
Matthew Amster-Burton 30:46
We have a couple of segments. Yeah.
Molly 30:48
Okay. What are we calling this one is this junket update?
Matthew Amster-Burton 30:52
Update? We're gonna need? We're gonna need a song for this.
Molly 30:55
And what do we mean by junket? Do we mean press junket?
Matthew Amster-Burton 30:58
We will. Let's let's come up with a song and then and then people can decide for themselves. Okay,
Molly 31:05
okay. Okay. chunk is good. It's wobbly,
Matthew Amster-Burton 31:10
John. Good. Monopoly. Okay, good talk. It's junket update with a special guest. Ken albala. Who's not he's not like on the phone or anything but we're gonna read an email from him. Okay, great. Okay, that's that's probably the best internet ad segment. I just getting a message. We just won the Academy Award for a segment
Molly 31:34
I've always wanted it. Oh, I'd like to thank all of our listeners who've been with us for so long and never never gave up.
Matthew Amster-Burton 31:42
Doo doo doo doo doo. We're not playing you off. Yeah,
Molly 31:46
okay. Anyway, all this to say this is a one time segment so enjoy. think my
Matthew Amster-Burton 31:50
parents shit. Okay, here we go. All right. This we talked about junk it on the nutmeg episode. It was like a like a wobbly dessert.
Molly 31:58
Is it like a like a rice pudding or bread pudding or it's a milk pudding. It's a milk pudding. Okay, Ken writes
Matthew Amster-Burton 32:05
once again walking to work and I get a shout out so junk. It is indeed a milk thickened with rennet and sweetened it's at the stage when cheese solidifies and becomes wobbly but isn't cut. So the way is still part of the final smooth texture. You can buy rennet tablets to make junk at putting curds and whey is also coagulated with rennet or lactic acid fermentation and is cut so the way seeps out and you have curds, like cottage cheese and thin liquid way. Little Miss Moffat was the daughter of Thomas Moffitt noted physician who approved the dish and health improvement. That's the name of a book. It's written as if it's the name of a book. Okay. He was also in Iraq monologist, hence the interest in spiders, so it is said, and then Ken dropped a link to something at University of Michigan. I don't know what it is.
Molly 32:51
Is there anything that Ken doesn't know? Nope. Oh, okay. Well, thank you.
Matthew Amster-Burton 32:56
Ken also said next time we have a question for him. Drop him an email while we're recording the episode and he'll probably get back to us before the episode is over. We absolutely have to test this okay.
Molly 33:06
Okay, I can't Okay, we've got some spilled mail
today spilled milk comes from listener Marina. Do you ever go to toothpaste that you always use? Or do you I feel like I'm reading this like it's
Matthew Amster-Burton 33:26
a go to toothpaste that you always use? Well throw toss to the side and try. Okay. Do you ever go to try to think of it of a brand of toothpaste and the only thing that popped in my head was Flim Flam which you buy do you face called Flim Flam?
Unknown Speaker 33:44
I often call her dog
Matthew Amster-Burton 33:48
your dog toothpaste?
Molly 33:49
No, no. Okay. Do you have a go to toothpaste that you always use? Or do my work toothpaste my work tooth
Matthew Amster-Burton 33:59
that is okay, we've got a budget spelled bail lately and I've got a bit I haven't I haven't put all of them on the agenda. But when Linda Marina said work toothpaste like this is the only thing I could think about now forever. Why does it work dude?
Molly 34:13
Okay, wow, this whole thing is fixing to me get ready. Okay, my work toothpaste is hollows minty charcoal flavor.
Matthew Amster-Burton 34:24
Okay, I assume hello is like like a brand of like natural products. Okay,
Molly 34:28
I got a sample size from grove.co A while back and really enjoyed it. It turns your teeth blackish while brushing
Matthew Amster-Burton 34:37
for a disease. Fun. Is that fun?
Molly 34:40
And the flavor is pleasantly mild. I usually use WELEDA seasol Toothpaste at home which tastes a bit minty but not salty. The salt makes my teeth feel like I was just at the dentist so smooth.
Matthew Amster-Burton 34:52
I do love that feeling lately though, I've
Molly 34:54
been out of the wilayah and so I've been using my partner since a time I don't hate the Sensodyne but it has an artificial flavor profile and the post brushing field is underwhelming. It is good with helping tooth sensitivity. So even when I have my preferred toothpaste, I will use it sometimes. I associate the taste of Colgate with traveling which should make me feel positive about it, but I hate how strong it tastes. And it makes my mouth feel like I needed to brush my teeth again. I've tried Tom's in the past but find the flavors to be too much with a flat mouthfeel while brushing. I have never had a new paragraph. I have never had French pizza before. Thanks for the great little listener Marina. Portland, Oregon. First off, love this
Matthew Amster-Burton 35:45
is one of my favorites. Listener Marina. If you do try French bread pizza, I would recommend brushing before and afterwards but you were gonna do that. No,
Molly 35:52
no, no, I've only brush afterward. Ah, wow. Okay, so I do what was the
Matthew Amster-Burton 35:57
question? Go to? Over right. Okay. Yeah, I can answer this way. Do you ever work too fast?
Molly 36:05
I don't but I work at home. Except when I'm here at your house. Do
Matthew Amster-Burton 36:10
you? Yeah. Do you have you only bring to my house? No. Okay. But okay, here we did a toothpaste episode many years ago. Here's my
Molly 36:19
go to toothpaste. And I think that actually listener Marina I think is maybe has a more like a more finely tuned palate for toothpaste flavors than I do but more than anyone else does. Because I have been using for most of my entire life. I've been using crest brand, regular paste. Tartar Protection Formula. Sure.
Matthew Amster-Burton 36:44
I remember when they introduced this
Molly 36:45
is the one that it's an opaque paste it Yep. It's a pale blue. It has a strong minty flavor. It is not it is not a flavor that I associate with mint in the wild. It tastes like mint toothpaste. I
Matthew Amster-Burton 37:00
think Colgate plays a bunch of foragers.
Molly 37:03
I don't. It's never occurred to me to look for anything else. I did have a boyfriend for a while who used Tom's of Maine. The fennel flavor. Yes, we've gotten that occasion. And it was better than I thought. But I associate a clean mouth with mint.
Matthew Amster-Burton 37:20
And I associate fennel with Italian sausage. And that's not necessarily a two phase flavor that I want. Yeah, yeah. Okay, my answer is I do I use the sense of dying because I always also have sensitive to these. And it does seem to help other could be a placebo effect. Occasionally, wife show Laurie uses Tom spearmint. And I will occasionally use that because it's kind of milder than the Sensodyne. And sometimes they just want a little change of pace. Like if I like brushing in the afternoon,
Molly 37:45
Ash uses Sensodyne. And I find that the taste of the sense that I tend to be more mild than my crest. Yeah, I
Matthew Amster-Burton 37:52
think that's true.
Molly 37:52
I don't like I like a toothpaste with a really strong minty flavor. Sure.
Matthew Amster-Burton 37:58
I feel kind of disgusted when there's not enough flavor. I feel like I'm just like wiping putty on my teeth or Yeah, like you'd like dipped into the spackle That's right, and went for traveling. I always tend to carry like a little travel size tube of toothpaste that I bought at a Combini in in Japan. I think I got one on our last trip. And so I refreshed it and it's cootie Nika, Clinica brand. And it's just like a, you know, minty toothpaste that doesn't claim to have any special features. As far as I know, I use
Molly 38:27
whatever brand of travel toothpaste the dentist gives me when I have my regular appointment. And I think it's usually like Colgate clean or something. It's one of those. It's got like baking soda. So it's a little gritty, and I don't really care for it. But it's so convenient. And so that's what I always throw
Matthew Amster-Burton 38:44
in my Oh, yeah. Does your dentist ask you like, Do you want a toothbrush? Yes. And I always say yeah, of course. Because like, do I look like a guy who doesn't want free stuff? Well, and
Molly 38:54
also everybody needs to have like a toothbrush around for like scrubbing around your bathroom drain or whatever. And who wants to spend money on that?
Matthew Amster-Burton 39:01
Nope. Because like I want I want my dad's is to provide it and definitely, definitely I'm not paying for it indirectly.
Molly 39:07
No, definitely right. Wait, hold on. Yes. I would like to ask our listeners on our Reddit Yeah. To let us know how they feel about toothpastes in particular. Well, I don't think I've ever articulated before that I like a toothpaste that is extremely strongly flavored. Yeah, like I feel yucky when there's not enough flavor. I'm gonna guess
Matthew Amster-Burton 39:29
that you articulated this when we did the toothpaste episode, but that was probably 2011 Okay, so yeah, head to the Reddit everything spilled. milk.reddit.com I almost just said everything.reddit.com which is probably a more general discussion site. And do you have a work toothpaste?
Molly 39:45
Yeah,
Matthew Amster-Burton 39:46
I mean, yeah, now that now that listener Marina says it I feel like a work toothpaste seems like a pretty solid idea.
Molly 39:52
You know what I also want to know so you know, they're like those expensive like, I don't know the toothpaste brand. Is that seem really esoteric like marvelous? It looks like you're rich for my blood. It looks like it's a tube from like, the 1920s I don't even I don't know where you buy this but a friend who I shall not mention by name. I was once traveling with this friend and they had that toothpaste and I was like, why would you bother to have this like designer like apothecary looking toothpaste? Like what is the point of this? And I would like a listener to let me know if that toothpaste is somehow extra special. Or if it's just a status symbol toothpaste.
Matthew Amster-Burton 40:31
I mean, sounds pretty special. Matthew? Yes,
Molly 40:35
I have a now but wow. Wow, what up?
Matthew Amster-Burton 40:44
Molly texted me before before the show and said I've got a doubt but wow. And as usual, for me, it's a real downer. So let's hear about it. Yeah,
Molly 40:50
great. Okay, so we're recording this episode, actually a month before it comes out. Hi, everybody, it's June one.
Matthew Amster-Burton 40:57
But here when one that's how you say it in English, but June 1,
Molly 41:01
but we're recording this on May 1. And on May 8, in the May 8 issue of The New Yorker, there is a new poem by the poet Danica Kelly. And the poem is called fishing in the blood and what I love about it the reason that I wanted to mention it today is well, it's it's newly out. And it feels like a capsule short story in like a very short poem. Okay. There is an incredibly strong sense of voice that comes through in it. I mean, I really feel that I'm like listening to a character and I get this like capsule of a whole life and a whole family. Okay, in this very short poem. And anyway, yeah. Denisa Kelly is brilliant. Married to the also brilliant Melissa Bebo's to Nika Kelly has a couple of collections out one called beast Thierry, and one called renunciations. I think, okay, maybe others. That's what I'm thinking of at the moment. If you are someone who reads poetry, go check out Denisa Kelly's latest in the New Yorker. It is called fishing in the blood.
Matthew Amster-Burton 42:08
Yeah, and I bet if you Google that or we'll link to it in the show notes. If you haven't used up your free articles this month from The New Yorker, you can probably read it for free. That is right. Yeah, we we stand for like if a poet's got a new pod and poem just find some way to read it for free. Don't pay a post.
Molly 42:23
Don't listen to Matthew. I'm Molly. Our producer.
Matthew Amster-Burton 42:29
Says is a new segment I'm Molly Listen to me. Our producers Abby, sir. Catella. Molly's got a wonderful newsletter called I'm Molly, listen to me. It's actually called I've got a feeling.
Molly 42:42
Yeah, it's on substack you can find it at Molly Weisenberg dot substack. Calm,
Matthew Amster-Burton 42:47
please rate and review us wherever you get your podcasts. My band early to the airport, as you know, because I've been telling you for weeks still has an EP out called departures and I think it's fairly good. And so check that out. Oh, yes. And until next time, thank you for listening to spilled milk.
Molly 43:05
It's like brushing your ears right after eating French bread pizza. Yes.
Matthew Amster-Burton 43:11
I'm Matthew Amster-Burton. Molly Weissenberg.
Is the Zoltar machine for the movie big movie Where? Where? Elizabeth Perkins?
Molly 43:31
I know. Seriously, I don't know what to do. I know I'm like the 18 million person who's an adult right now about a new movie and it's like okay, so the movies of my childhood big splash
Matthew Amster-Burton 43:43
big splash splash it's all it's all movies with with Tom Hanks having a problematic sexual relationships. Right.
Molly 43:50
Okay, let's have a mermaid. Let's have sex with an adult when were a child. What other movies were in my childhood? Oh, Spaceballs, Spaceballs. Sure Spaceballs
Matthew Amster-Burton 44:01
and all like Oh, what
Molly 44:03
was the one where?
Matthew Amster-Burton 44:03
Those those
Molly 44:04
three controllers a mannequin? Oh, it's
Matthew Amster-Burton 44:06
called mannequin again? Yes.
Molly 44:08
What are the like romantic comedies of your childhood? Oh, jeez.
Matthew Amster-Burton 44:12
I mean all of those for sure. Like I've seen each of those movie like, five times. Oh, yeah. Many more other romantic comedies? I don't even remember this is a romantic comedy or just are like, No, I think it was a comedy. Do you ever see the movie irreconcilable differences? No, I
Molly 44:29
don't think so. Oh, that sounds really funny. Vacation.
Matthew Amster-Burton 44:33
But again, not romantic comedy but but like a you know, like, like a trashy, like a raunchy comedy of the 80s
Molly 44:41
and we're not talking about like National Lampoon's National Lampoon's Vacation.
Matthew Amster-Burton 44:45
That's the one. Okay. What
Molly 44:46
about National Lampoon's European Vacation? Absolutely. We talked about this. Oh, you talked about this so much. There's nothing we have not talked about.
Matthew Amster-Burton 44:54
It actually improved European vacation was the one where when I saw it as a kid, I was like, there were boobs in this movie, and it's awesome. That's what I thought right and then and then I found the scene and went back and watched it I'm like no I'm sorry this this girl is like barely 18 I hate this
Unknown Speaker 45:09
okay
Molly 45:11
okay well uh