We're just just a couple of cool cookies about to have a moment. Today we're hoping for vodka luges but will settle for raw dough as we taste these toothsome and chocolatey feats of food science. We Jingle All the Way to church on another episode powered by sugar and decide Tube, Tub and Lumps will never be topped.
ABC "Don't Drown Your Food" PSA (1985)
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:04
I'm Matthew, and I'm Molly, and this is spilled milk, the show where we cook something delicious, eat it all, and you can't have it
Molly 0:10
today. We are talking about, okay, well, so let me give them most. Let me give them most sort of the title that will allow you to understand what. Okay, right? We are talking about store bought cookie dough, yeah, and the cookies you can make
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:27
from it, right? But what we called this episode is cold cookies, or possibly cool cookies. I don't think
Molly 0:32
we decided. We were out with Abby last night, and she referred to this episode as cool cookies, which then we thought was pretty great, too.
Matthew Amster-Burton 0:38
We're a couple of cool cookies. The teens. The teens love to listen to our show, apparently, anyway. So this is, this is cookie dough you buy at the supermarket. Yep, yeah. It was suggested by me because I wanted to do something cookie related. And so I was looking, looking back through our many past cookie episodes. I'm like, Well, we haven't done this.
Molly 0:55
And the other thing is, this show is coming out on Matthew's birthday. Yes, I just want to point out Matthew is turning 50, yeah?
Matthew Amster-Burton 1:03
And probably, like, right as you listen to this, like, I've been thrown the most lavish party, yeah? Like, all my favorite celebrities just arrived in a helicopter.
Molly 1:13
There's gonna be a vodka luge.
Matthew Amster-Burton 1:16
It's gonna be on fire. Wow, caviar. And you're all invited, if you can, if you can figure out where the party is and make it there by the end of this episode,
Molly 1:25
also, if you can tell Matthew how to figure out where the party is,
Matthew Amster-Burton 1:29
I have not found it yet. I'm following the smell of like the vodka. What did you say? The Ice loose, the vodka, luge and the burning
Molly 1:42
flesh.
Matthew Amster-Burton 1:43
Burning flesh, the ice loose is on fire like it's like, it's not, it's not a it's not a party, unless something tragic happens. All right, so happy birthday to me, and I get cookies.
Molly 1:56
That's right. Happy birthday to Matthew. But no, seriously, this guy is 50 today, or if, when you're listening to this episode, he's 50, yeah. I
Matthew Amster-Burton 2:03
mean, like, seriously, but, but it's not that serious, right? Everyone. No, 50. There's a cure, right?
Molly 2:10
Yeah. Okay, quick. Let's get into the episode before he realizes there isn't.
Matthew Amster-Burton 2:16
Oh no, okay, all right, so the quintessential version of this product is like the tube of cookie dough left Pillsbury cookie dough available in your grocer's refrigerator case.
Molly 2:27
And I remember this being sort of like a sought after item when I was in middle school, maybe my friend Jennifer and I, when she got her driver's license, she got to drive her mother's old Oldsmobile Sedan.
Matthew Amster-Burton 2:44
Oh, wow. Were you constantly saying this is not your father's Oldsmobile because it impact was not, it was
Molly 2:49
not okay? No, we called it the beast. Sure. It was navy blue
Matthew Amster-Burton 2:53
last last week we had a beast on last week's episode, but it was an overgrown rosemary. Bucha,
Molly 2:57
well, there's so many beasts in this world, and anyway, the beast rest in peace wherever that car is now. But I remember driving with Jennifer when she was, like, newly 16, and going to the grocery store and getting a tube of Pillsbury cookie dough and eating it in her car while we talked about, like boys we had crushes on, and it was a peak teenage moment.
Matthew Amster-Burton 3:20
Okay, we're going to talk about this because, like, I don't think I realized the extent to which people like to eat this stuff raw until I started researching the episode. Yeah,
Molly 3:28
I have only ever eaten it raw, and, in fact, I remember I think I liked it, okay, but I started making chocolate chip cookie dough at home as a teenager, and then eating it just closer, because I liked the idea of it so much. There
Matthew Amster-Burton 3:46
is like, like, a peanut butter cookie dough ice cream that I really like. Other than that, in general, I've never been into eating cookie dough. Do
Molly 3:55
you have any of the dough here today that we could be sampling in small quantities before we eat the baked cookies. Yeah, whoa. Hold up.
Matthew Amster-Burton 4:05
Wait a minute. So I got, I got the what Molly is shocked by is that it's not a tube. It's a flat, rectangular package. And the reason is, like this, like the tube is much more dough, and I didn't want to buy a huge amount of cookie dough, but it's the same stuff. It's just these are, these are, like, in little each one that is this one. Yeah, there's something nostalgic about
Molly 4:27
that. Very sweet has a bit of a whipped texture. Hmm, that's fine, yeah. I mean, I would totally eat it in an Oldsmobile. Oh,
Matthew Amster-Burton 4:35
yeah, yeah. I Yeah. I would too, like, if I was with a good friend, yeah. So let's, start there, because people have always liked eating cookie dough. Cookie dough is not safe to eat. For the most part. This
Molly 4:47
one is I have lived dangerously. Yes, I know so many times
Matthew Amster-Burton 4:51
the big outbreak was in 2009 I think after that, for some reason that I could not figure out, because, man, was it hard to get any information about this. Stuff, not just like the foodborne illness portion, but just like pre packaged cookie dough in general. Not a lot of information out there, but Pillsbury switched to eat, treating their flour and pasteurizing their eggs so it's safe to eat raw. Nestle, the other big brand did not so is Nestle gone? Now? Nope. Nestle is in my fridge now, but you didn't pull it out because you don't want to die, because I want to eat it raw. So raw flour is a very potent source of food borne pathogens. It's the flour much, much, much more so than the eggs. Hold up. Yes.
Molly 5:34
Hold up, yes. Matthew, are you telling me that when you and or Laurie bake a cake or make cookies or something that you don't eat any of the raw dough, or, like, lick the beaters, or anything like that.
Matthew Amster-Burton 5:47
Generally not but it's because I don't really like the texture. What about Laurie? I don't think she does. I don't know. It's a good question. Wow, we should, we? Should
Molly 5:57
you grow up like licking the beaters? Licking the beaters? Yeah. Okay. You know, did you let your kid lick the beaters? Now,
Matthew Amster-Burton 6:04
I mean, my kid is 21 years old. They can do whatever they want. When they were younger. Did you let your kid lick the beaters? Try to remember, I don't
Molly 6:14
do forever licking the spatula or the beaters or the spoon. Yeah,
Matthew Amster-Burton 6:18
for me, if it's, it's it, yeah, it's just, it's a textural thing, not, not like a, like a foodborne illness thing, for the most part, for me, like, there are some textures I like to lick off a beater, like, any, anything that's sort of like custardy or whipped, creamy, sure, cake batter doesn't really appeal to me, but, but, yeah, like, you know, it's one of these things. It's not like, you know, you can, you can lick a lot of beaters and like, never run into trouble. It's just like, you know, you can do a lot of stuff in your kitchen and never run into trouble, but if you do, it's gonna be because of raw flour or unwashed salad greens or something, or something like that, or eggshells.
Molly 6:56
Yeah? Okay. I can't believe you're being so serious right now. I know. Well, let's get it out of the way. Oh, so how was the Wait a minute? Hold on. I need to ask some more questions, please. So I know there have been a whole bunch of, like, outbreaks of foodborne illness recently because of, like, bagged lettuce. Sure, when you've bought, like, baby lettuces, let's say, at the farmer's market, do you always wash them?
Matthew Amster-Burton 7:20
Yes, you do. I do. Oh, but do I wash the pre washed greens from the supermarket? No, even though there have been outbreaks traced to those also, okay,
Molly 7:31
yeah, I've stopped buying those. And when I get baby lettuces, like, in my CSA box, I do wash them because often they're, like, actually dirty, but I don't wash the, like, arugula or something that, yeah, that the Farm gives to me in a
Matthew Amster-Burton 7:47
bag. I don't, I don't either, like, yeah, no, I don't know. Like, I was just wondering, you can't, you can't protect against all dangers in life. And, like, washing, scrupulously, washing all your salad greens sounds really annoying to me. So you don't even have a salad spinner. Salad Spinner. I do it. I do it by hand. Oh, my God. I dry each leaf with like a little, a little tiny hair dryer.
Molly 8:11
And it's like a race against the clock because they might wilt.
Matthew Amster-Burton 8:13
That's right, yeah. I mean, it is, yeah, it's I turn off the heat on the hair dryer. Oh, you press the little button, cool, air. Yep. So, okay. So wait, you bit a cookie. I'm
Molly 8:23
sorry. I bit into a cookie. You've got these sitting in front of me, and I needed to eat them. So, okay, I tasted the Pillsbury. It was not it's okay. It's fine. I feel like I need to taste more things before you start talking.
Matthew Amster-Burton 8:38
I mean, the first thing I would say about this, I do want to say one thing before I dig into anything else. Like this is not like a great cookie, but it is better than, like, any chocolate chip cookie you would get, like, packaged in the cookie aisle. I think because it's freshly baked, that's right. Let's try this Nestle. Well, okay, let me get some of the rest of the packaging. Okay, we can see what we're eating,
Molly 9:02
okay? And then you can tell me about the fascinating history of these things. Oh, wow. So none of these is a tube. I'm noticing no tubes, no tubes we've
Matthew Amster-Burton 9:17
got because the tubes are like two pounds of dough I could have sent you home with with most of it. Don't know. It's
Molly 9:22
fine. It's fine. So there's this kind of flat pack of Pillsbury that you pulled out, and the dough is in sort of tiny
Matthew Amster-Burton 9:30
pucks, yeah? This is pretty much all all, like, Puck, Puck, focused puck format, yeah. And this, these Nestle ones you can still see, like the shape of the puck, yeah,
Molly 9:39
which is kind of pleasing. It's like a square puck. Okay. Then we've also got Hello Robin, which is a high end local store bought frozen cookie dough. They also have cafes and things around Seattle. And then there is, what's this? Last one, Matthew, this
Matthew Amster-Burton 9:57
is one is Capello's bakery style cookie. Dough, chocolate chip with flaky sea salt and it's gluten free.
Molly 10:03
Is that this one? Yep, I felt like I could tell, because it looks more tender, sort of crumbly. Okay, Matthew, hold on. I got a taste. Yeah. I just
Matthew Amster-Burton 10:11
took a took a bite of the Nestle chocolate chip. Lovers, this is quite
Molly 10:15
good. The texture of this reminds me of a soft batch. Remember soft batch. It's got a caramelly flavor. That's a little, I
Matthew Amster-Burton 10:24
mean, I like it because it has more chocolate chips in it than the Nestle one. The Nestle one is, sorry, than the Pillsbury one. The Pillsbury is a little shy on chips. But, like, I kind of got two different product categories,
Molly 10:34
yeah, no, no, but I I agree. Like, I mean, it's hard to fault this. It's a, it's a freshly baked chocolate chip, right?
Matthew Amster-Burton 10:41
Yeah, no, if someone served this to you, you're not going to complain. Okay, curious about the capellos here.
Molly 10:46
Wait, I'm going to try. I'm going to try the Hello Robin one, the like high end one.
Matthew Amster-Burton 10:51
Okay, this has the best flavor, obviously, the best one. Yes, oh yeah. All this is, is like, real cookie dough, exactly like you would make at home, frozen in a bag. Yep,
Molly 11:01
you really actually taste the butter in the dough. You taste the dough as being distinct from the chocolate chips, whereas in the the Toll House. I mean, I love how much chocolate there is, but it's like indistinguishable from the dough.
Matthew Amster-Burton 11:13
Now I kind of wonder, and I don't have the answer to this, because, like I said, the corporate history was thin on the ground. It seems like the freezer is a better place to put your dough, like you don't I get that. It's nice to be able to, like, slice, slice and bake is satisfying. Or like, to be able to, like, dig out the amount you want. If you don't need my preservatives and stuff, you don't need preservatives, and it's it's gonna be better, like I they had to do, like, a whole bunch of food science in order to keep it in the refrigerator. And why?
Molly 11:41
Okay, I just tasted the gluten free one. The texture of the dough has a lovely almost, oh, I think this is good. It's got this toothsome quality, almost as though it has Bran in it. You know that texture when you eat something that has Bran in it? What's the flour? That's really nice. I like that. Almond
Matthew Amster-Burton 12:01
flour. Oh, it's great. Sorry, no, it's a mix. Sorry, it's a white rice flour, almond flour, tapioca starch, brown rice flour, coconut flour,
Molly 12:10
that's a great cookie. It's also less sweet. Is less sweet than the Hello Robin? I think so. And it's saltier. Yes, it's less sweet than the Hello Robin. I
Matthew Amster-Burton 12:21
really like their slogan, you're about to have a moment. Sounds like you're gonna have an orgasm, right? Okay.
Molly 12:29
Oh, that's phenomenal. Yeah, no, it says,
Matthew Amster-Burton 12:31
it says, right here, this cookie, this cookie is gonna make you come.
Molly 12:35
Hold on, Matthew. Hold on. Was this refrigerated or frozen? Frozen? Okay, and where can you find
Matthew Amster-Burton 12:41
this? I got this at the Co Op, central Co Op, but I think it's a national brand. It's from Denver, capellis, capellos. It's got a little top hat. Wow. It's really good. Oh yeah. Oh, that is excellent.
Molly 12:58
Okay, well, we're done.
Matthew Amster-Burton 12:59
I mean, kind of, I'll tell you a little bit about corporate history, but like, it's gonna, it's gonna generate more questions than answers. Okay, yeah, I was so excited, because I was like, Molly always gets to do the corporate history, and she is kind of, like the queen of corporate history. And so, like, I look at there's, like, nothing. All right, here's what I've been able to determine, refrigerated cookie dough from major brands has been around since the 1950s It was first marketed by Pillsbury, and then shortly after, by Nestle in the in the late 50s, Pillsbury introduced slice and bake in foil wrap tubes in 1957 and according to a blog called The nibble.com which I was not able to independently confirm this information, the first four flavors were butterscotch, nut, crunchy peanut, sugar cookie and toasted coconut. This stuff got a lot more popular in the 90s and is now available in a few different formats, like tube tub and individual lumps, like we had today. Sorry,
Molly 13:57
tube tub and lumps. Tube tub and lumps. Oh, my God, I totally want to have three dogs named tube tub and lumps. Or, like, like, like, three goldfish or something. Tube, tubing
Matthew Amster-Burton 14:10
lumps. Remember the song tub thumping? Yeah, I sure do. It was really big when I was in college, yeah. Speaking of things that were big in the 90s, well, there's a sequel called Tube thump.
Molly 14:22
And then there was, then there was lump something.
Matthew Amster-Burton 14:26
Songs have sequels.
Molly 14:28
Lump thumping was, it was really, it was a spin off of my
Matthew Amster-Burton 14:37
so gross jumping. And and now premium and local brands have entered the market. There we go. That's pretty much the corporate history
Matthew Amster-Burton 14:59
when Ben and Jay. Jerry's introduced chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream, first in their scoop shops, and like, the the end of the 80s, and then, like, in stores, I think, in 92 this was not only a massive hit for Ben and Jerry's, and at one point, accounted for 20% of their total sales, but also was was, like, a big boon for the for the refrigerated cookie dough market, because people are like, I want to eat more cookie dough. Yeah,
Molly 15:21
right, yeah, oh, yeah. So I'm also thinking of a Seattle based, like, small bakery called Good luck bread. They make, right? They make a refrigerated dough that they sell themselves. We had this recently as well. It's frozen. It's frozen. Sorry, it's frozen, not refrigerated. And they make a birthday cake cookie, which is basically like a confetti cookie. Yeah, and it's fabulous.
Matthew Amster-Burton 15:45
We just had their peanut butter. We like ordered it with some pizzas. It was great.
Molly 15:48
It's so good. But anyway, you Yeah, those are not distributed widely. You have to be in Seattle to get those bad boys.
Matthew Amster-Burton 15:55
I wanted to focus on chocolate chip today, but there are also a bunch of other varieties from the big brands. I was looking at the Pillsbury website, they have Pillsbury big cookies, salted caramel, chocolate chunk and also a Lucky Charms cookie, which contains the Lucky Charms marshmallows, which I don't think it would be good, but I'm kind of glad it exists. Yeah, me too. Me too. How many of the Lucky Charms marshmallows Can you name off the top of your head? Ooh, let's, let's find out. And I mean, like the ones from when we were kids, stars, rainbows, moons, Clover, you gotta have the colors, oh, green, Clover, purple, blue, blue stars, yellow moon, yellow moons, yeah. Pink horseshoes, hearts, pink hearts, yeah, Black Spades and Black Spades back, black diamonds. Yeah, for I would eat the black diamonds when I was going down the toughest ski runs.
Molly 16:50
I don't know, okay, can you name them?
Matthew Amster-Burton 16:52
No, I thought. I thought maybe I could, because there was, there was like one commercial where, like the Lucky Charms, leprechaun would rattle them off. Lucky the Leprechaun would rattle them off. And back then I would have been able to, because I saw that commercial 100 times a day. But apparently not anymore, and they change them all the time.
Molly 17:08
You know, I do feel like you know, you and I, we have sung many a jingle on this
Matthew Amster-Burton 17:14
on this show. We have so many a jingle No, but like,
Molly 17:17
like, jingles that we heard in ads when we were girls, jingles we have heard on high
Matthew Amster-Burton 17:26
Molly. When we were kids attended an unusual church where, instead of hymns, they played advertising jingles. Who's called this sometimes you feel like a nut church. I
Matthew Amster-Burton 17:44
and our God was Tony the Tiger. Please continue
Molly 17:48
at weddings, they would play the big red theme song.
Unknown Speaker 17:52
Yes, exactly.
Unknown Speaker 17:54
Okay, but hold up.
Matthew Amster-Burton 17:56
And what would they play at funerals?
Matthew Amster-Burton 18:02
Maybe. I was hoping something would come to us,
Molly 18:07
okay. But anyway, hold on, Matthew, yeah, yeah, we have a lot of brain space that is devoted to these jingles that we probably have not actually heard in their original form more than two decades. Do you think kids today, know any jingles?
Matthew Amster-Burton 18:22
That's a really good question. Or do they only know? I mean, because
Molly 18:25
it's all streaming now, and you can pay enough that you don't even have to see ads, and if you do see ads, they're not often
Matthew Amster-Burton 18:31
local, right? But, I mean, a lot of the jingles, like, we had local jingles, but we also
Molly 18:37
that's true. You're well, you're right. What am I thinking? Jingles. Don't care about geography,
Matthew Amster-Burton 18:41
yeah, jingles. Jingles are like post national
Unknown Speaker 18:46
jingles. Don't give a fuck about your nation
Unknown Speaker 18:52
state. Jingles don't
Matthew Amster-Burton 18:53
know borders Exactly. They don't recognize borders. Wow, I think we can learn a lot from jingles. Everyone is legal in jingles exactly. I tried to, I'm gonna be stuck on, like, I'm gonna be texting you tonight at like, like, about 2am about which jingle is most appropriate for a church funeral. Oh,
Molly 19:14
my God, is like, big red tater skins.
Matthew Amster-Burton 19:20
That's, the one they play the tear skin. Well, extra extra gum. Get extra flavor, extra fun with extra sugar free gum. There were, there are a bunch of gum ones. Wasn't did Mentos, was that a jingle
Molly 19:42
the fresh maker? Yeah, I don't remember a jingle. I just remember the fresh maker
Matthew Amster-Burton 19:46
jingles come to you when you're not looking for them, right? Because, if you like sitting, like, I'm gonna try and pick up some, think of some jingles like, You got nothing. But then, like, later today I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be like, Dave skins got big.
Molly 20:02
People, no jingles. Wow. Jingles have so much personality. They only come when you not look, when you not looking for them. Jingles are pro immigrant. Jingles have, like, a lot to teach us. That's
Matthew Amster-Burton 20:17
right, is that like a mark of a good friend? Like, I definitely yes. I want my friend to be pro immigrant. But like, do I want them to show up when I least expect
Molly 20:24
them? Well, no, but it's kind of like love, like, okay, decide to stop looking for it. It comes to you.
Matthew Amster-Burton 20:30
Love and jingles. Yep, you're right. Okay. Double mint had a good jingle, but it's not coming to
Molly 20:37
me. Double the flavor, double the fun. No, that didn't you just do. Was that extra you just did?
Matthew Amster-Burton 20:43
But extra is extra flavor, extra fun. Oh, there
Molly 20:48
were always twins in there always twins.
Matthew Amster-Burton 20:51
Double man. Here we go.
Matthew Amster-Burton 21:00
Great feeling. Okay, this is not one of the best, best jingles, but the hot, androgynous 80s girls, I think you're gonna really love, like,
Molly 21:11
double the pleasure coming for you. Oh, these women are not androgynous by 80s standards, okay, but now they're totally, totally queer, coded, right? Yeah, oh yeah, no, I'm into them. Oh, but they're sharing it with some some male twins. What? Wow. Double pleasures, waiting for both of them. Oh my God, in the way the two women look at each other at the end, they're totally gonna make out, yeah, with their twin sisters. That
Matthew Amster-Burton 21:40
is not one of the best jingles, but
Molly 21:41
double pleasures waiting for you,
Matthew Amster-Burton 21:45
yeah, no big red is way better, yeah. Okay, all right, so that was, that was our cookie, cold cookie episode. I've got some spilled mail, please. Let me have it.
Molly 22:02
You okay. This one comes from listener Tessa, Hi Molly and Matthew, longtime listener of the pod, and look forward to it every Thursday. I recently listened to the morels episode, and you both mentioned that you had a somewhat irrational fear of poisonous mushrooms. This reminded me of how I told my husband a few years ago that I strongly believe that the reason I didn't like mushrooms as a kid is because of the children's book Babar, where the king in the story dies from eating poisonous mushrooms. He laughed at me, this is presumably Tessa's husband. That was the King, the dead king, but then reflected that he thinks he didn't eat peppers as a kid, even bell peppers, because he'd seen smoke come out of the ears of Looney Tunes characters that ate them during Saturday morning cartoons. Do you have any memories from growing up of a book or TV show that influenced your eating preferences in a positive or negative way? I don't. So I thought about this a lot this weekend, and I didn't come up with anything, but I'll tell you that. And I know we've talked about this before, but I have to bring it up a bring it up again, which is that the wedge of mushroom that the caterpillar gives Dorothy in, I mean, Alice,
Matthew Amster-Burton 23:10
yeah, I was, I was, I was giving you a look like, I think I know what's going on here. But
Molly 23:15
in Alice in Wonderland, in the Disney animated version, that wedge of mushroom that he gives her, and she bites into it and she becomes big or small, big or small, yeah, that mushroom has always looked fabulous.
Matthew Amster-Burton 23:30
Yes, yes, so I know what you mean 100% so mine is like, I don't think this actually influenced me, but I still think about it pretty often, and it is jingle related. Yes, did you ever, I know we've talked about this before, but did you ever see see as a kid the don't drown your food? Public service announcement? No. So there was a public service ad that the idea was to, like convince kids not to overuse condiments. This is real. I swear this is real. And the jingle had, don't drown your food. Okay,
Molly 24:10
don't drown your food. I mean, I thought this was maybe a PSA about, like, keeping plastic bags away from young children. Oh, right,
Matthew Amster-Burton 24:18
because those are your food. Okay, so we're going back to our favorite segment, which is when we look stuff up on YouTube during the episode. If this isn't here, I'm gonna think I've lost my mind. Don't drown. Okay, thank God. It's auto correcting. It's auto complete. Don't drown your food. I rescued
Speaker 1 24:40
a drowning potato today. They drowned in it, sour cream. Oh, what a shame, because food's so much better when it's practically plain.
Unknown Speaker 24:51
So what drown your food? It may also catch your burgoo. Yuck. It's no fun to eat what you can. Can't even
Matthew Amster-Burton 25:04
say what that is so much weirder there food is best when it's practically plain said, nobody ever what?
Molly 25:14
Oh, my God, Matthew, that's that is just wild stuff.
Matthew Amster-Burton 25:18
Yeah, okay, I'm so glad I remember that we'll put a link to the don't drown your food commercial. Who, who was behind this? Like, I sort, I sort of get the like, like Nutritionism angle to this, but only sort of, I mean,
Molly 25:31
at the same time, like, conceivably, around that time, I don't know, there were, like, a lot of malnourished children in Africa who would have loved to have all that mayonnaise,
Matthew Amster-Burton 25:42
absolutely and but I don't think the point of the commercial was like, save, save the mayo for the kids who really need it. But I'm just thinking
Molly 25:48
about what we were putting our money toward, sure,
Matthew Amster-Burton 25:53
like, and like, how did the mayo industry fight back? I know, big May, right? Big mayo. Yep. So I do, like, every once in a while when I'm when I'm like, you know, putting a putting a bunch of barbecue sauce on a french fry, I think about, don't turn your food. So I guess it was effective.
Molly 26:08
It reminds me of so June used to have this, like, big yellow rubber ducky. It was like giant, like, maybe 12 inches from, like, tip of the nose to the tip of the tail. And there was a period of time where every bath June took, they were probably, like four. Every bath they took was mostly about June washing ducky. Oh, of course. And this would involve, you know, soaping up their hands, cleaning the duck, whatever. And then, of course, the duck had to be rinsed. But the way that June would do this was put their hands around the neck of the ducky and shove it down in the water, like, fully, like, drowning, big Ducky, yeah. And it just makes me think of, don't drown your food,
Matthew Amster-Burton 26:46
yeah, bath time always ends up getting so weird, right? Because, like, you do it every street. Do it every day. It's like, the same toys and, like, the stories just getting more and more bizarre. So this was long before the movie, okay, so when did the movie, Despicable Me come out, I might be about to say something that's a lie. Yeah, I began with the 2010 film of the same name. So long before that movie ever came out, in like 2004 when, when December was a baby, all of the rubber duckies, and, like their bath usually contained like 10 regular sized rubber duckies were called minions, really, yes, and it was because one of them was the pirate captain and all the rest of them were his minions.
Molly 27:25
This is amazing. Have you guys tried suing we should? Yes,
Matthew Amster-Burton 27:30
okay, didn't we sue someone earlier in this episode, or maybe last week? It might have been last week. It might have been last week. Yeah, yeah. We've become very litigious lately. Yeah, don't drown your food, kids food. Food tastes best when it's practically plain. It's kind of sad. It is kind of sad. All right, that was our What was that episode? Cookies, cool, cool. Cold cookies. Cold Comfort cookies,
Molly 27:55
yeah. Cold Comfort cookies, yeah. We'll link to these, these videos, these perplexing videos, yes in the show notes. And if you think of a jingle that would be great for playing during a funeral, please let us
Matthew Amster-Burton 28:11
know. Contact at spilled milk podcast.com or you can hop on our subreddit at reddit.com/r/everything. Spilled milk, it would be a great place to talk about funeral appropriate jingles. Our producer is Abby cercatella. Please rate and review us wherever you get your podcasts and until next time. Thank you for listening to spilled milk, the show that
Speaker 2 28:33
I just came up with, the Lucky Charms. It's frosted Lucky Charms. They're
Matthew Amster-Burton 28:39
magically delicious. Bye. How could you dessert? Me like this?
Molly 28:50
Okay, so this episode is
Matthew Amster-Burton 28:53
brought to you by milk. It does
Molly 28:56
a mustache, good. Okay, Matthew, you start us off. I.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai